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Stephfon Bennett: Dumbest Robber in U.S. History?

Wednesday, September 9, 2009 at 11:44 am
Stephfon-Bennett.jpg
Stephfon Bennett, robber and lady's man supreme
​Okay, so we realize this is a highly competitive field, filled with thousands -- if not millions -- of contestants. But we believe we have a compelling case that Stephfon Bennett is the dumbest robber in U.S. history. Let's go to the replay booth and look at the evidence, shall we?

Three armed men robbed Daniel Martinez Batista and Diana Martinez outside their apartment building. They managed to get a wallet and a purse, then fled the scene. But there was something about Diana that Bennett found appealing. So he thought to himself, "Hmmm, perhaps she'd enjoy the company of a man with a demonstrated incompetence in the art of the armed heist?"

So two hours later, Bennett returned to the scene of his master caper to -- get this -- ask Diana out on a date. Yes, a date. Possible pickup line: Would you like to see my collection of used wallets and women's handbag apparel? She naturally recognized her lovestruck assailant and called police. Stephfon now faces charges of aggravated robbery and impersonating a legitimate criminal.

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