I was on Brian's mime team before he moved to L.A. I was already married, so he didn't bother me. It allowed us to just be friends. I observed many things about him back then. He worked very hard to be good at his art and he was. He was a good teacher. He had us watch videos to improve and then worked on skill drills. Brian kept us booked at libraries, churches, schools and I also went with him to Europe to perform in the streets. He would hand out tracts afterward. He drove us everywhere. He didn't make a lot of money, but loved performing and seemed to be fairly happy. He did have a male room mate and was renting a small place at the time. I got to kind of "observe" him from a more objective viewpoint I think. Back then I did not know him to be all the things that I am reading that others have posted...never knew him to be a drunk, cheat, stalker, gambling addict, drug useer, and I never ever saw him get angry. He smiled a lot and was very friendly to everyone. He did flirt with single girls and was always attracted to pretty ones. He did this by being charming, but was not aggressive. Once I did think it was odd when he mentioned that his parents kind of always made him think he was pretty perfect (I thought to myself at the time...what a mistake to make as a parent). I can't remember exactly how he worded it; I just remember thinking this may have been responsible for the few character flaws I saw in him. Everyone has flaws though and no one is perfect. In fairness to Brian, I do remember him really broken before the Lord once. I could tell he was troubled one night. It was obvious that the Lord had him doing some soul searching and he state that the Lord was showing him his faults and things he wanted to change in him. Occassionally he would mention to me about finding the right girl someday to marry. I remember he was good at getting a cute girl. Keeping them, not so much. Once he came and said, "what should I do?" (meaning to get her back since she didn't want to see him anymore). The girl he was trying to get back was a really sweet, Christian girl. He was leaving her notes on her car, sending flowers; trying pretty hard.

I never saw him get angry or hear him raise his voice or display any kind of physical aggressiveness. This is why it is difficult to imagine him committing this kind of horrific crime.

If he did do it, I would have to say that the fast life really changed him...drinking and drugs can make you a different person. He may have had some of the negative qualities back then (like thinking a bit too highly of himself, or being a bit selfish in general). The difference is (again, IF he did this) before I think he could actually recognize his own weaknesses and failures and would see a need within himself to change. He knew only the Lord could change him. But it is possible to get caught up in the things of this world (even to the point of putting God on the back burner for a while)and it certainly sounds like that is what Brian did.

I feel so badly for Felicia and her family and am praying for her mom and the pain she must be going through. She was a very beautiful girl and I know the Lord loved her deeply. I am sure Brian's family is very sad and torn up about this as well.

Sin's grip is strong, but God's love is stronger. Still, God gives us the choice to accept or reject him every day that we get up. He did not make us puppets, thank goodness. We have a choice and He let's us sin if we choose sin over His ways. God tells us in His book "For the wages of sin is death, but the gift of God is eternal life"......and another passage tells us to "Choose you this day whom you will serve"....and still another verse is simple and to the point as it states: "Choose life".

Moses and others in the Bible were murderers; yet later they turned away from sin and God came to call them "men after his own heart".

Still, I am reserving judgement on Brian since I don't know if all the facts are known yet. I will wait to hear the verdict of the jury. I am thankful to live in a country where we are innocent until proven guilty.