Anthony Galluccio, Massachusetts State Senator, Blames Toothpaste for Failed Breathalyzer Test



​Massachusetts state Senator Anthony Galluccio has a problem with the sauce. Or more accurately: He has a problem getting caught while driving after imbibing in said sauce. Prior to his latest adventure, he already had two convictions for DUI…

A 2005 conviction came after he caused a four-car accident in Boston. So when our hero crashed again in October, then fled the scene after injuring a father and his 13-year-old son, a court placed rather strict sanctions against him.

He was given two years of probation, told to stay away from the drink, and forced to take random urine tests and breathe into a sobrietor multiple times a day.

Alas, he still didn’t seem to get the picture. On December 21, a probation officer went to his home to administer a breathalyzer. Galluccio failed — twice.

Since bullshit is his profession, the lawmaker attempted to blame it on toothpaste. But a judge wasn’t buying. Galluccio was sentenced to a year in the slam, where the liquor is of somewhat lesser quality than that usually enjoyed by state legislators.