Did gold digger kill her elderly boyfriend?
Janakaye Lee, 14, Disappears with Boyfriend Steven Hecker After He's Charged with Sex Crimes
Thursday, Feb. 25 2010 @ 1:17PM
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| Steven Hecker was charged with sex crimes for his relationship with his 14-year-old girlfriend, so they fled Iowa |
Hecker was charged with third-degree sexual abuse, distributing obscene material and exploitation of a minor.
But instead of taking the pinch like a man -- and finding a girlfriend his own age -- he decided to take Janakaye and flee.
They disappeared Monday morning, and a suicide note was found at Hecker's house. Police believe he's armed and dangerous, but his dad says he has no weapons and doesn't think the girl is in danger.
The young couple is believed to be somewhere in Illinois.
UPDATE: The young couple went to Hecker's grandparents house in Illinois, but they took off before police arrived.
Shelly Lee, Janakaye's mom, said they went to the home in Sorento, Illinois, outside St. Louis. But they were somehow tipped that police were coming, so they left before they could be caught. They haven't been heard from since.
The two are now engaged, says Shelly -- something she's not very happy about. Turns out she didn't know Hecker was 19 when he started dating her daughter. When she found out, she went to the sheriff's office.
Though Hecker left a suicide note at his dad's house, he says Janakaye willingly took off with his son. He doesn't believe either of them are in any danger.
Police are monitoring Hecker's bank and credit card statements to see if he's leaving a money trace, but they haven't disclosed whether they've found anything at this point.




uh oh
Posted 02/23/2010 at 05:05:39 PMHow can a 19 year old "kid" rob the cradle? There's a bigger age gap between me and my girlfriend.
In some countries 14 is legal anyway, and I'm not just talking about some poor developing countries.
There's something somewhat romantic about them running away together. The suicide note was probably just so that they wouldn't be chased or something. As long as he doesn't actually kill her then I'm with him on this one.
Posted 02/23/2010 at 05:29:12 PMWOW...that's the age difference between my husband and I...that is crazy...but 14 seems young...maybe 18 and 23 does not seem so bad..?! I hope that they end up alive and just wait it out a few years..not the end of the world...
Posted 02/23/2010 at 05:35:20 PMGeorge, the key word here is "illegal". Not only that but the age and maturity difference between a 14 and a 19 year old is WAY different than say a 25 and 30 year old. This isn't other countries and some douchebag taking a child with him is in no way romantic. You folks that think it's romantic obviously don't have teenage daughters. That would be like a 17-year-old wanting to date my 12-year-old daughter. Frigging nasty. How about 14-year-old boys screwing 9-year-old girls? How romantic is that you douchebag?
Posted 02/23/2010 at 06:04:55 PMU are exactly right Shell. Age difference does'nt much matter as long as BOTH in the relationship are OVER the age of 18!
Posted 02/23/2010 at 06:10:53 PMShe is a CHILD you crazy agreeable idiots. She is practically in middle school and this kid could be in college. Doubt it though. I'd shoot his ass if I were her father. Kidnapping too! Not romantic at all. This girl has no ability to consent at that age. She needs to be at school hanging out with children her own age.
Posted 02/23/2010 at 06:14:23 PMThis is utter bullshit. They both chose to go. And yes, I do have teenage daughters, so you can just shut the F up.
Posted 02/23/2010 at 06:14:32 PMSo it'd be cool with you guys if she were dating a 9 year old? Same age difference? Cuckoo!
Posted 02/23/2010 at 06:16:48 PMNobody, 14-year-olds DON'T have the legal choice to go. period. iLLusionS is right. I don't guess I would have waited for the police to take care of that either. Call it vigilantism or whatever you want. 14-year-old children don't have the emotional capacity to make a long-term decision like this on their own which is one of the reasons we are legally responsible for our children until they are 18.
Posted 02/23/2010 at 06:28:10 PMMeh, judging from their depraved comments that is exactly what they are saying.
Posted 02/23/2010 at 06:29:02 PMwhen they catch him-he should be castrated. He is taking advantage of a juvenile ...
Posted 02/23/2010 at 06:30:28 PMPete Kotz is there a reason why you blocked my post on Andrew Wirth? After viewing some of the other comments mine are mild. Do you have an explanation?
Posted 02/23/2010 at 07:46:15 PMIt is legal to marry at age 14 in Alabama with parents consent and there are many states were 16 is legal. Treating someone as a hardened sex offender for like a girl 5 years younger than he seems silly and misguided.
Posted 02/23/2010 at 08:11:10 PMCouncil bluffs, leave the teens along, I could see if he was 29 with a 14 year old girl, but 14 and 19--you have got to be
joking!!!
P.S. "when I was 16 I was having sex with a 22 year old woman, and nothing happen, what's the big deal!!!
Posted 02/23/2010 at 08:13:52 PMDUI, use a Proxy server, that with fix that *sshole", he's
Posted 02/23/2010 at 08:19:13 PMblocking your IP address, a proxy server is a way around that bs!!!
Whether it is illegal and whether it is immoral or unethical are different things though. Both over 18?
So say there is one day of difference in ages, and one is 17 while the other is 18. Illegal. Ridiculous.
What about if both are 14? People shouldn't have relationships at all until they are both 18 or what?
On the other side, I know a 22 year old girl that was with a 40 year old man for a long time. That's legal but just plain wrong.
Posted 02/23/2010 at 08:57:24 PMAnyway, my point is use some common sense don't just say that whether it is strictly legal is what is important.
Thanks John I can not understand why he would completely block my comments.Has he not read what other people are saying on here. What is his problem? Jenni is dead she can not speak for herself I have not mentioned it before because I don't feel that I should have to.I loved Jenni she was a good person and did nothing wrong, all she ever wanted out of life was to raise her son and help people. She was a funny lady that loved to joke. she did not deceive to die like she did.
Posted 02/23/2010 at 09:01:57 PMscrew council bluffs (Omaha), run teen run..go to LA, they'll never catch you down there since there are tons of run away teens on the streets looking for lots of "HOT" action!!!LOL.
P.S. "Just Bluffing"
Posted 02/23/2010 at 09:02:36 PMEveryone needs to remember that the media sensationalizes EVERYTHING. There are always three sides to every story - yours, mine, and the truth. Nobody on here has any idea what the maturity level of either of these kids is. Nobody on here knows either of these kids or the family situation of either kid. Nobody knows what was or was not done to try to prevent this.
Posted 02/23/2010 at 09:03:33 PMIt is easy to sit back and judge or arm chair quarterback but unless you are in the middle of this situation, you have no clue. I sincerely pray that none of you have to endure the pain that BOTH of these families are dealing with.
@ goerge If u are referring to my post than all I can say is don't take everything so literal. My opinion and the law are obviously two different things and the scenarios u gave erradict. That was my point though any grey areas can be covered by making it so the youngest part of a legal relationship is no younger than 17 but at least 18. People can give several age scenario relationship each different but some ABSURD! Some have a fine line where they think 14 is a good age for consensual. NOT ME 14 is to close to 13 !
Posted 02/23/2010 at 09:06:00 PM@ DUI
I have read some really insane posting worse than any thing I have ever posted, yet he blocks me most of the time under a different name, but it never gets blocked using that other name while using a proxy server which has a different IP address than I do, and the posting get listed right away.
P.S. You're welcome
Posted 02/23/2010 at 09:11:16 PM3 criteria:
- Physical maturity (& not just)
- Mental maturity
- Ability to earn a living
A very few states allow girls to marry at 14 ( & a whole slew of countries) Boys can marry at 16 in most places with parent consent. Some places marry at 12 and I guess that is okay if the life expectancy is age 36 like in medieval times. Of course a medieval midwife is a damn sight better than a doctor 250 to 150 years ago (I am a gentleman & gentlemen don't get germs).
The girl is probably not in middle school she probably is a freshman but she probably should wait 'til she is 18 or 19 and fully physically mature to avoid complications.
People use to earn a living at 16 and graduated college at 16 regularly. However since we can let move the age of majority from 21 to let's say 23 or 25 & not expect them to get a trade or earn a degree 'til 30.
What do you do to an 18 year old senior and a14 year old freshman? Does it matter if the boy or girl is older? What if due to the time of matriculation one is 19 in MAy of graduating year & the freshman started school a little early. Naturally, the parents should have counseled these two, but wtf, let's take the guy out and burn him at the stake. After all our morality need not be consistent.
Posted 02/23/2010 at 09:14:24 PMIn her photo she looks older than 14. She must have been consenting to have a relationship with him. She knows what she's doing. If teens have something stuck in their minds that they want to do and it's something they want really bad, no matter what they will do it. You can't lock them in a closet or chain one to a bed and no matter how hard you try to "make a teen understand" their going to either take it as a "lecture" or their going to toss your ideas/thoughts to the wind and do as they darn well please. I know, I have a daughter who loved her boyfriend (no matter with all the things we did to try to stop them) she got pregnant, had her baby a month before she turned 15. She did great, btw!! She took care of her baby very well and lived with us (her parents) for 3 yrs until they were married. During the 3 yrs before they married, he had some flings and another girl had a child by him, but my daughter still married him knowing this. She had 2 more children from him and they stayed together for 8 yrs until she realized he was not faithful. Divorce happens at any age, it doesn't matter that she was young...people who are older get divorced. Everyone does what they want to do. So, this 14 yr old was not kidnapped, it seems like she went with her boyfriend on her own free will. They feel their "in love" so they ran away to try to stay together. It is sad when someone young (in their early teens) is compatible with someone who is over 18, but attraction strikes those who are easy for each other to be around with. They "hit it off" and sounds like there was no way of stopping them.
Posted 02/23/2010 at 09:15:21 PMMy daughter was head-strong , very determined on what she wanted and from this 14 yr old girls photo she has that same look on her face as my daughter had. She will have to live and learn from her choices. This is a topic I can discuss a lot about.
John How do I use or get a proxy IP address. What if I get soft-ware to be private will that work? Can you help me. Pete will not explain himself.
Posted 02/23/2010 at 09:18:06 PMdui and John...I thought our email addresses are suppose to be private on here. Am I wrong?
Posted 02/23/2010 at 09:26:18 PMDo you know how horrible posts can be deleted? Someone commented on another topic and what the person said was disgusting yet I haven't seen where you can report on comments or find how to delete them.
Dont girls mature faster then boys!?! Well look at it like this she could be two years more mature then her real age, he two years behind in maturity. Thus u have a 16 year old dating a 17 year old.
Posted 02/23/2010 at 09:48:08 PMGotta say, that 19 year old looks 15. But this is definitely an interesting case-in-point to several debates that have gone on here.
Posted 02/23/2010 at 09:54:54 PMI don't know that I would call 22 with 40 "wrong!" I would be less uncomfortable with this if the kid was not 19 and out of high school. I would want them to both have their X boxes taken away or some silly parental punishment, but not jail time. But it comes down to the parents. Obviously, they are the ones who didn't approve, because cops probably don't make a habit out of knocking on car windows and checking IDs when kids are making out. Or if they check ID as a matter of formality, they aren't likely to press charges. It's the parents bringing it to law enforcement that facilitate legal action. In which case, if you know your girlfriend's parents don't approve, especially if you're a grown man, you have to step up and work it out or walk away.
Posted 02/23/2010 at 10:15:10 PMShell, you must also understand what was going on from the girls point of view; while yes, she is young, she is also looking for someone to actually give to shits about her. (And don't EVEN pull out the "oh, well, her parents give two shits" card, because you and I BOTH know it's a different kind of shit giving.) I remember at fourteen I was MISERABLE, and if I had had someone like that, I probably would've been better off. Now, that said, you nor ANYONE else for that matter could really actually know what went on in their relationship. Only she knew/knows if he's taking advantage of her. And believe me, just because she's fourteen doesn't mean she doesn't know the difference. SHE DOES. So, before you go running your yap about age differences, check your facts.
I also think you comparison is extremely inaccurate. You're comparing someone who's already developing/hit puberty, with someone who's hasn't/isn't. I.e: the fourteen year old with the nine year old.
Posted 02/23/2010 at 11:20:32 PMI've known Steven for about 3 years now, he is a very close friend of mine. He told me he was going to turn himself in, obviously something scared him. Wouldn't the possibility of a ten year sentence scare anyone though? Especially a 19 year old? I know they ran together, haven't heard from him since Sunday night. He's no pervert or creep, actually he thought she was older than that and didn't find out she was fourteen until after they had sex. Just put yourself in his position, and think long and hard about what you would have done.
Posted 02/23/2010 at 11:57:08 PMI encouraged him to stay and push through it though, just want to be clear that I am not saying I'm glad he ran.
Posted 02/24/2010 at 12:00:15 AMPonder the facts
Posted 02/24/2010 at 12:17:29 AMYour IP address is not private this website has your individual IP address. I can't even put a comment in the comment area Kotz blocked my computer from scrolling down to the comment box?
I told you before, DUI. We didn't block you. It's probably just a glitch on that particular page. If we blocked you, your comments wouldn't be coming through anywhere.
Posted 02/24/2010 at 12:22:50 AMBefore you continue to get pissed off at me I respond back to you on your other answer to me some where on another story. It's not that I can't comment but on Wirth I can't scroll down to the comment box. I'm not trying to be rude I just would like to comment. It's Okay.
Posted 02/24/2010 at 12:52:49 AMYea, when they say rob the cradle and age difference. I thought the guy would be like 63 or something.
Posted 02/24/2010 at 01:00:31 AMIt's not illegal for the guy to date a minor, its just illegal for them to have sex. They're a bunch of immature babies.
Posted 02/24/2010 at 01:10:38 AM@Jesus Christ - you are a sick, sick mofo. I think you only posted that comment to see what reaction you would get. @everyone else - there is NOTHING wrong with a 14 year old dating a 19 year old. Maybe she is mature for her age. Most guys are not mature and can not be considered men by the age of 19. When I was 14 I dated 18-20 year olds!I was mature for my age. No big deal. It's only a big deal if the parents make it that way. Each case should be judged on an individual basis. I do not think that making teenagers in scenarios like this become RSO's is the answer to anything. Our whole RSO system needs a total overhaul. You know it's become ridiculious when a guy who pees on the side of the road in the middle of the night with no one around can become an RSO for life if a cop happens to drive by while he is doing it. Get a grip people! Yes, there need to be laws, yes our children need to be protected but come on, use a little common sense!
Posted 02/24/2010 at 10:23:55 AMThere is no comparison between 9 & 14 and 14 & 19. At 14 many people have hit puberty. That said it is not like it is a fine dividing line. There is the bathtub curve (no pun intended), which they probably don't explain anywhere in sex ed, because those teachers probably never were into statistics or quality.
Posted 02/24/2010 at 11:14:48 AMThe point is even though they crossed the threshold there are still major risks, which drop off rapidly. Kids should know that. If they did the might cool their heels til they were 18.
Consider, General Pershing was entering West Point at 16. General March completed college at 16 & then entered West Point. There was no talk of them being geniuses. they were just normal. In contrast, in my state they are talking about raising the drivers age yet again. If this trend holds people will have pacifiers until age 30.
I am the parent of a 15-year-old girl. When she was 14, she thought she had met the guy of her dreams. the problem? He was 17 at the time and turned 18 soon after they started going out. Now she didn't know he was turning 18 that soon or she may not have bothered. Everyone around her was telling her how wrong she was, etc. I told her that she was too young for him, but I also had to step back and let her make her own mistakes. I know that may not make sense to some of you on here, but the relationship blew over just like that because I didn't pressure her. now, I don't know these 2 kids' circumstances. could be close to what happened with mine. could be different. Just putting my opinion in
Posted 02/24/2010 at 01:23:25 PMHere's the deal... I am the dad of two darling little angels. If a 19 year old MAN wants to date my 14 year old daughter he better kill me dead first. It CAN'T happen. When I was 14 I mistook lust for love a TON of times. She is 14. She is in 7th or 8th grade at BEST. NO ONE... I mean NO one I know would allow this to happen in their home. You are a product of your environment though and you do as you see or you aren't well seen and just choose to DO as you please. If he didn't know she was 14 (because they WILL lie... I did) then it is not his fault but for a MAN to see a girl and want her is nasty... PERIOD. this is NOT an opinion, it is a pure fact. Mature for her age (mockingly) just because you have boobs and new hairs does NOT make you mature. Well developped will NEVER equal maturity in my house.
Posted 02/24/2010 at 02:01:05 PMFURTHERMORE, it is my plan (not necessarily what will happen, but my PLAN) to see to it that my daughters don't become phuk dolls for a-hole guys. I was a teenage boy too but I dealt with girls my age... always. As I got older I wanted OLDER women... not younger. Honestly... who cares what's going on in her head... it is WRONG! PERIOD! Dispute it but the fact remains that a college age young MAN...likely two years out of high school should NOT be dating a middle school KID! Take a step back HELL... if Daddy can't get it for you then you don't need it. For any jerk who sees otherwise, I will attempt (just attempt mind you as I have NO clue the future) that the fact remains that if whomever you choose isn't at the LEAST as good to you as your Dad then he will have to be better. My wife is THAT woman. Her Dad took care of her... didn't spoil her but took awesome care. Now she has me to do that and she didn't live her teen years a mess looking for love. She didn't lie about her age because she needed to be held or plowed. She was a good girl and the woman that chose me will ultimately raise HER (our) daughters to be the same. I am there EVERY night... tea parties and all. Dolls and dress up... the whole nine. There is no manual but I feel as though I am writing a pretty good one as I go.
Posted 02/24/2010 at 02:31:42 PMThis is going to be another heated debate over age differences. This particular case definately falls in the gray area. I'm really not sure how I feel on the subject. Does it fall in the "child predator" area? No, I don't think so. Is a 19 year old a little too old to be dating a 14 year old? Probably. But I'd also say it's a case by case basis. The reason these type of stories cause such a big debate is they are both teens and she is on the line of being a child and being a young lady.Those of you saying "would it be ok for a 14 year old to date a 9 year old" that's a terrible argument to try to make, a 9 year old is a CHILD. Those of you saying you are dating a person of the opposite sex with a larger age gap than this can't really make that argument either, if you are both adults then it is a decision that both ADULTS have made. With that being said, I think there is a "creepy" limit there too. For instance, good ole Hugh Heffner and his 18 year old girlfriends..........now THAT is creepy! But like I said I think it's a case by case basis. If I had a daughter that was 14 would I want her dating a 19 year old? Hells to the no. Mainly because I know what is going through the mind of a 19 year old.
Posted 02/24/2010 at 02:34:02 PMI think I'd like to hear some more details on this story. But as of right now I think I'm going to have to go with a 19 year old guy is a little too old for a 14 year old girl.
Youngbutnotnaive, the girl's "point of view" has nothing to do with it. Also, the comparison is valid. A 14-year-old is only slightly more capable of making a reasonable life decision than an 9-year-old and that's exactly what this is, a life-changing decision.
Dad of Daughters, I am right there with you. You do bring up a good point as well about love vs. lust. I was "in love" many times before I got married at 21.
Also, just because one has hit puberty they do not immediately turn in magical decision makers. As a matter of fact, during puberty most teenagers go through a lot of emotional turmoil and it's even less likely that they will make the right decision where something like this is concerned.
Ryan, you are right about one thing. While I don't think there is anything at all "gray" about this area, I don't think this is a predator issue. Also, a 14-year-old IS a child.
Posted 02/24/2010 at 10:24:18 PMThis really bothers me in some ways, and not becuz of some age difference and not becuz they ran either. The Girl and guy are in LOVE people! what cant u understand about that?! love is love, u cant help who u fall for or what age they are! Of most people you would think the older you get the more u understand this. I am sure that her parents didnt like her being with some 19 year old but, she loved him. Love is a powerful thing. its not like he raped her. If i was her then hell yea id run with the person i loved to, especially knowing thats the only way to protect the person i loved was to run, so i could spend my life with him forever.. I think that you people rlly need to understand thier point of veiw, not just judge it.
Posted 02/25/2010 at 05:39:16 AMI don't necessarily think its the age difference so much as that there is that much of a difference considering the ages they are now. I think its more acceptable in society if the two were older and had that big of a gap. I don't think its that she's not old enough to make her own decisions, but I'm sure more maturity would being more sense on how to handle the situation.
Posted 02/25/2010 at 01:07:19 PMHey Pete Kotz-thanks for the update.
Posted 02/25/2010 at 01:58:14 PMI think 14 is right at that threshold for "Is this person mature enough to handle their own sexual decisions." If she's mature enough I don't see a problem with her dating a 50 y/o guy. It's not like her romantic/sexual preferences are hurting anyone.
Although chances are she's just having a crush and doesn't fully understand the life-altering magnitude of her undertaking. That's a problem.
People who think that couples shouldn't be able to express their love because they personally find it repulsive: just imagine if people found your sexual preferences repulsive. I'm sure you'd then see the injustice in the situation. Try being empathetic and ignore the invisible sky-man. He's prolly imaginary anyway.
Posted 02/25/2010 at 02:10:10 PMOk here we go,
LADIES AND GENTLEMEN WE HAVE OURSELVES ANOTHER PEDOPHILE TRYING TO JUSTIFY THEIR SICK PERVERSION TO ALL OF US.
David,
Posted 02/25/2010 at 02:31:08 PMYou are a sick bastard. If you can honestly say you don't see anything wrong with a 50 year old man dating a 14 year old girl, then you have just earned yourself the title "Sick twisted douche of the day". People like you need to have your computer activity monitored. You are nothing more than a child predator trying to find some way to justify your sick acts. May you burn in hell.
David is most definitely a pedophile. He said on a previous post that he thinks there should be pornographic artwork of children so that pedo's have something to use for their sick fantasies.
I hope you're taking note of his ip address, Pete. Oh wait...you're probably not doing anything as usual.
Posted 02/25/2010 at 02:37:55 PMmcr, don't rail against pete. the man is supplying you with this website and comments section. it is because of him that you are even allowed to complain. ive read postings from him that says he cannot literally police every comment. just ignore the comments you don't like. more often than not, its probably just someone who is trying to get under everyone's skin.
Posted 02/25/2010 at 03:58:33 PMI'm 20 my boyfriend is 17, not a big deal.
Posted 02/25/2010 at 04:05:58 PMIt's all based around individuals.
When i was 14 i dated an 18 year old,
the worse that happened was i got my heart broken.
It's a personal decision.
C'mon -- Yeah, you're totally right. Pete invented the internet for people to complain. And I don't know WHAT I would do without this comments section!
He bought the website from someone else and from what I've heard it's gone to shit. So why is it that when someone else was in charge, this kind of stuff didn't seem to happen so much?
Posted 02/25/2010 at 04:18:46 PMI go on this cite everyday at work,
Posted 02/25/2010 at 04:24:01 PMit's disturbing, but that's what makes it popular.
The only thing that bothers me is when people focus more on their egos then the story.
I mean I have nothing against anyone, it's just dissapointing.
David, a 50 year old with a 14 your old is a dispicable though, I'm sorry. There is absolutely no defending that. That is really no different from pedophilic desires for a 12 year old to me.
Posted 02/25/2010 at 08:55:15 PMBrandi, I think 14 with 18 is slightly easier to comprehend by the fact that they could have actually shared a study hall or a lunch period with each other. Once the relationships starts between a freshman and an adult male who is no longer in high school, I do think it starts to leave that grey area. By the same token, 20 and 17 sounds absolutely normal to me, whereas 21 and 15 does not. See the difference?
Posted 02/25/2010 at 08:58:23 PMYeah, i definetly do. It's just such a grey area because when she is 20 he'll be 25, and i know that's different, but when you're young you don't see it that way.
Posted 02/25/2010 at 09:05:32 PMYou only think, "this is the person i love."
The one thing i disagree with about this story is the fact that he let her run away with him.
He should be responsible enough to know that's ridiculous.
The age thing is just such a difficult area.
Father of Daughters - I totally agree w/ you. I have a 13 year old daughter and would NEVER allow her to date an 18 year old. Their brains aren't fully developed and they are just too impressionable. I'm sure she thinks she's in love and he's the only one, but there will be many more in the future, once this guy goes to jail. Maybe this guy is nice and was deceived, but he should have broke it off once he found out her true age.
Posted 02/25/2010 at 09:12:10 PMBut Chris, what about if your daughter is a 14 year old freshman, and she crushes on some senior? That's so common. I found his comments pretty patriarchal and almost like, too possessive of his daughter. Sure, disapprove and let the kid know, but if you take that hard of a stance on it, you know that is going to push your daughter into the guy's arms faster behind your back, right? Seems to me more dad's ought to really do some soul-searching and remember they were probably sexually active at that age. If less men treated their sons and daughters that vastly different in regards to sex, and treated their daughters less like their property than their responsibility - i.e., to teach them about safe sex and respecting themselves, I think we would find a better balance. It's like it wouldn't surprise me if some of the men who say what they would "let" their 14 year old daughter do (as if she isn't doing it with or without your blessing) would be the first one to either look the other way or pat their 14 year old son on the back if he had sex at that age.
Posted 02/25/2010 at 09:17:54 PMOk, while I can truly appreciate some of the positive comments towards this young man, I'd like to emphasize some of the comments about the age difference issue are way off base. This is not an age difference issue. This is an issue of two KIDS (yes, the 19 year old is still a kid) who may not feel they are receiving the love and attention they need and deserve from their families. They are looking for love and understanding wherever they can find it. Don't you remember being young and misunderstood or confused? And, as a parent, haven't you made some mistakes along the way? Don't you have time where you have regretted your actions or lack there of? You just do the best you can with the tools you are given and pray the kid does not have deep and lasting scars. Those of you are being so critical of this young man do not know his background, maturity level or family situation. This is not a bad kid. This is a kid who did not finish high school due to learning disabilities that his parents did everything they could to help with with. Feeling frustrated and like a failure, he quit alternative high school and was so afraid of failing another thing, refused to even try to get his GED. His family has tried almost everything to help guide, push, pull, plead him to keep moving forward to complete his education. He is a very hard worker and very responsible with his money. He is often loyal to the wrong people and gets frustrated with those who truly love him. I know his family has "failed" him in so many ways but that does not mean they have not tried, given up or thrown him to the wolves. They love him so much and really, really hope they get the chance to tell him so in person again. Please remember that this young man left a suicide note. When he left that morning, he had planned on ending his life, not taking this young lady on the run. It is very likely that the only thing keeping him alive is the fact that this young lady is with him. Steven's family just wants both of these kids home and safe. They will ensure he (and the young lady who, mind you went willingly) steps up and deals with whatever consequences are coming. This is exactly what they were doing before these kids took off. You have no idea how close of an eye they were trying to keep on him. This is a very strong family who will stand by him, do everything they can to get him the help he needs and love him through every step. Maybe, if we get these kids home safely, it can be a new positive beginning for both kids and their families.
Posted 02/26/2010 at 01:32:32 AMOk, because of this statement of the charges against him...
Hecker was charged with third-degree sexual abuse, distributing obscene material and exploitation of a minor.
Is this the case of the boy who distributed his ex-girlfriends nude pictures around to all his friends and then those friends distributed the nude pics further? And, the girl had to change schools?
Posted 02/26/2010 at 05:09:13 AMIf so, then she decided to not be his ex-gf after all. She's making her choices. Since it's stated that he thought she was older than 14 and also her own mother states that she thought he was younger than 19, the relationship was allowed to prosper at the beginning. They became familiar with each other on an intimate level and once that happens
there's no turning back (unless one or the other of them calls off the relationship). To turn him in, for him to end up with charges against him is sad because Janakaye knew (and still knows) what she was doing. Shouldn't there be some law against her too then...she obviously didn't tell her true age to him, she consented to a sexual relationship,she is running on her own free will (he didn't kidnap her) so... for the charges against him, shouldn't there be some charges against her too? Wait, as a mom who has gone through this with my own daughter (having had 3 different counselors to help with the situation) it was the choice my husband and I made to not press charges against our daughters bf because we were advised if we pressed charges there was a risk our daughter would run off with him. We chose to deal with the situation in a way that was not attacking. We felt it better to get to know our daughters bf more, to be involved with how their relationship was, to try to counsel her the best we could as she was in the relationship and instead of attack,accuse,criticize we dealt with it on a mature level because we let our daughter know since she had made the choice to consent to an intimate relationship she needed to learn to be on an adult level. She did very well. She understood that because of her choices she was letting go of her "teenage years of fun" to become a responsible adult faster.
Posted 02/26/2010 at 07:20:39 AMDamn what a shame, that boy is just a kid himself, why should his whole life be ruined when it was obviously consensual and the parents knew about it? Maybe if he was a cop, or the son of a cop he might have gotten away with it. And that girl she's 14 and she is hot.
"David is most definitely a pedophile. He said on a previous post that he thinks there should be pornographic artwork of children so that pedo's have something to use for their sick fantasies.
I hope you're taking note of his ip address, Pete. Oh wait...you're probably not doing anything as usual."
-mcr
WTF? I've already explained that I'm not a pedo, but I feel bad for people who have unfulfillable sexual desires (I know my life would suck without porn). If I had your real name I'd sue you for libel.
Basically you're an idiot and you jump to conclusions because you think you're sooooo smart, when really you lack the cognitive capacity to distinguish truth from fiction in all but the most slap-in-the-face obvious circumstances.
Posted 02/26/2010 at 08:39:26 AMAnd yes, I think a 50-y/o having sex with a 14-y/o is gross. So what? Why the hell is my opinion on whether or not its gross relevant to what two people who love each other do behind closed doors.
I also think foot fetishes are gross. Should we make it unlawful to remove socks during sex? No, that would be stupid. It just restricts people's personal freedoms for no benefit.
If the involved parties are mature enough to consent to sex, I don't care who/what they want to have sex with. Neither should you.
Posted 02/26/2010 at 08:46:28 AMFurthermore, I have always maintained (in this very thread, for example) that it's wrong to have sex with someone who is too immature to consent to it.
Yeah, I'm really thinking about extracting monetary damages from you. You sullied my reputation maliciously and with reckless disregard for appropriate evidence (and despite direct evidence to the contrary.) You'd just better hope I can't extract enough info about you from what you've provided to this domain.
Posted 02/26/2010 at 09:02:11 AMmcr, you are exactly the reason the US is in such a state of collapse. This anti-intellectual universe you live in whereby you can simply believe things without thinking and replace open discourse with petty insults and sinister accusations is not a sustainable ideology. I can try to explain why, but I feel my efforts will be wasted. Do you agree that I would be wasting my time?
Posted 02/26/2010 at 10:50:32 AMWow, David 1/1,000,000,000,000 of others named David. No one has harmed you. Get over your own self worth. I'm sure you are a fine person, but no one here knows who you are, where you are or cares what someone else said about you.
You are entitled to your opinion, and I respect that, and your rights to share your opinions.
I think you crossed the line of being commented about when you said something about the idea of child porn comics to benefit those that have the propensity to want to fuck babies. No one here likes baby fuckers or anyone that would give them the lattitude to fuck babies, or further their sickness by even looking at cartoons of naked babies.
We do not need to feed their sickness as a society. What would be preferable is a frontal lobotomy for these sick people.
Posted 02/26/2010 at 11:30:06 AMDavid -- If you'd like, I'll email you my name. I'd like you to attempt to sue for me libel considering no one here knows who anyone else really is. Are you that stupid? Really David?
And I really don't care what your beliefs are. They're pedophiles and they should be killed off. Same with anyone who sympathizes with them, as well.
You sicken me and everyone else here. If you don't like that, go to the NAMBLA site where they'll probably agree with your views.
Posted 02/26/2010 at 11:41:29 AMI'd also like to add that I am the sole reason the U.S. is in such a state of collapse.
Seriously David, email me at mcr1986@comcast.net and I will give you all my information. Let's get this lawsuit rolling! I'm excited about it! I'd like to see the look on the judge's face when he tells you this lawsuit has no bearing and absolutely doesn't matter, and then jails you just for wasting his time and being a moron.
P.S. I'm in my first year at Lewis & Clark working on my JD, so I shouldn't have a hard time finding a lawyer, either.
Posted 02/26/2010 at 11:47:13 AMDAVID IS A PEDOPHILE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Posted 02/26/2010 at 11:50:43 AMWere his grandparents not home or...? Shouldn't they have tried to keep them there until someone could arrive. I understand that the 2 teens were tipped off and jammed out of there, but you would think something could have been done. Also, the engagement is really just that...they can't get married because she is not of age. Nothing legal could come of that.
Posted 02/26/2010 at 11:59:28 AMDavid,
Posted 02/26/2010 at 12:42:57 PMWAIT befor you start this "lawsuit" process I want in on this one.... DAVID YOU ARE A SICKO PEDOPHILE WITH CHILD PORN ON YOUR COMPUTER!!!
How's that, did I make the lawsuit cut? Just lemme know if you need my info.
Hey mcr, you mind if I email you? I just might need a lawyer HAHAHAHA
DAVID YOU SIR ARE A TOOL
Please David get over yourself!! When u make comments a pedo would make-you sound like one. Then you just sound like a weirdo when you try to explain them. As for the "lawsuit" I'm sure the ACLU will rep you, like the other NAMBLA slimeballs.
Posted 02/26/2010 at 01:20:03 PMMost definitely, Ryan. I'll even rep you pro-bono! haha
Posted 02/26/2010 at 01:27:50 PMSweet,
Posted 02/26/2010 at 02:18:37 PMOk David we're ready.
Hahahaha tool.
See this is exactly what I'm talking about what with the name calling and petty insults in place of attempting to find truth in open discourse.
And yeah, I still think that nobody gets hurt when someone jacks off to a picture of someone that doesn't exist. Why don't you try to explain who suffers in this case? Maybe cause you can't.
And really guys? nine on one? Dudes 6-8 are just pathetic.
Posted 02/26/2010 at 02:48:27 PMjaden, thakns for actually providing a response to the issue at hand. I'd like to continue this discussion with someone who isn't a brick wall, but I don't have time right now.
Posted 02/26/2010 at 02:49:59 PMDavid the pedophile defender,
What are you talking about "jacking off to a picture of someone that doesn't exist" and "explain who suffers in this case"?!
We are talking about a child rapist (the one you are defending). And if you don't think someone should get locked up for possessing child porn then anything and everything you post on here is going to fall on def ears. Everytime I see your postings the only thing I really see is:
"Hi my name is David, I like to call myself the Defender of Pedophiles, yes that is a title I have given myself but it's part of my fantasy, a fantasy where I am a super hero that defends pedophiles and at the end of the day when I fail to do so I lock myself in my kiddie porn dungeon for hours on end. I am a sick and twisted evil monster that has no place in society, someone please put me out of my misery"
That is all we see David the pedophile defender. Do us all a favor, crawl in a deep dark hole (no not your kiddie dungeon) and die. But call the police and turn yourself in first.
Posted 02/26/2010 at 03:27:21 PMAs I was, I got two stories on here mixed up, but still, David, my previous statement stands.
Posted 02/26/2010 at 03:29:25 PMDavid you and Anon need to get together.
Posted 02/26/2010 at 03:30:48 PMSorry, Ryan, was my bad...I took it OT to address David with the entire scenario, and therefore took you off topic as well.
Posted 02/26/2010 at 03:41:52 PMYou want to know who would suffer if the world were to take your advice, David? EVERY CHILD ON THE PLANET!!!!!!! We shouldn't be encouraging this kind of behavior. You can only look at so much porn before you decide it's not enough. "Fictional child porn" would not extinguish the pedophile's urge to to fuck kids. Our goal isn't to make life more comfortable for sexual deviants. It's to get rid of them altogether. Anyone who doesn't think pedophiles should either be dead or behind bars is just as disgusting as the pedophiles themselves.
Posted 02/26/2010 at 03:46:54 PMNo worries jadensmokes, I still stand by my statement to David.
Posted 02/26/2010 at 04:03:37 PMthis is to all that protect peds it is sick and wrong and no fucking way sould a 19 year old should taking advanage of a 14 year old it aint molesting in my eyes it is all out rape can t tall me any differant when they catch this guy i hope he would get life because that is what all sexual prediters deserve less than put to sleep so i don t care what people think on this that don t agree with this because if u condone this kind of thinking u aint any better than that 19 year old
Posted 02/26/2010 at 08:29:18 PMB sounds like she is personally involved. Maybe the mother trying to cover the facts in this case. The facts state it plainly HE LEFT WITH A 14 YR OLD. He wasn't/isn't man enough to turn himself in and face what he has done. True, the girl left with him but good golly she is 14. No matter what he is a pervert. IMHO, he should be considered a sex offender.
Posted 02/26/2010 at 10:18:14 PMMakes you wonder are the parents still together. If so what has been done to help this man? I have watched the feeds over and over and have only seen the young girls mother and the man's father. Where are the other halves of the parents? Mother's can usually get through to their sons. Fathers with their daughters. Maybe just maybe if they pleaded for them to come home with any luck they might. I just hope they both come home safe and sound. Both need to face their punishment and move on from life's lesson learned.
The girl was in her third sexual relationship, the young man was in his first. He thought she was 18 at first, she thought he was l6 or 17. She had clymidia, he was tested and was clear. He bought a ring and gave it to her at Christmas. Evidently her unhappiness at home and his family explained that her 14 year old age was not appropriate was more that either could handle. There were two suicide notes. His and hers. He was going to turn himself in at 11am on Monday. His family reported his suicide note, hers was not. Did they run because he was afraid of being caught or did he run to save her life. You tell me
Posted 02/27/2010 at 12:57:53 AMIf what Gram said i true then, maybe the GIRL SHOULD BE PROSECUTED for everything that the want to charge him with! The mental & physical maturity. You need experience to be mature by some estimates. And she had WAY MORE experience than him. Prosecute here parents too! If they knew she had chlamydia & more than 1 sexual relationship, charge the with child endangerment (Fool me once shame on you; fool me twice shame on me.). Or was this a Planned Parenthood SPECIAL, where they keep parents and everyone in the dark about STDs treated etc.
Posted 02/27/2010 at 09:19:41 AM19 year olds, who can vote, are called teenagers, if the engage in crime instead of adults. What a way for so called news reporters to shade (BIAS) a story. In the past the Phillipines & Germany graduate people from highschool at 16. I guess Americans are just slower than most. Physically mature faster than most (due to lots of calories), but lets' slow any other maturity way down. TRAINWRECK; Shit Happens.
Repeat, menarche happens earlier with more calories and weight gain. School, year here is 9 months versus 11 months in Germany.
Ya, & many writers back, the writer was right. This had a much greater chance of being prevented if the parent shad at here down & talked about her SELF WORTH, goals etc. I means supposedly she is leaving suicide notes & making poor choices.
Only one person said this is her third sexual partner and his first. How do we really know that to be a fact? We don't we all are assuming because one person said so. I highly doubt if that is true. Still doesn't make it right for Steven to have sex with a 14 year old. Also, it was told that they lied to her parents about his age, I call that Bullsh!t. Why would they do that, maybe he did know her age and told the parents he was younger than he is because she is 14. That makes more sense to to me than they didn't know. In the eyes of the law he is and should be considered a sex peredator. I hope the prosecute him to the fullest, and SHE GETS HER ASS KICKED BY THE PARENTS. She sounds likes she needs to be placed in juvenile or maybe even the place called Boys Town since her parent can't handle her. This isn't the 50's or 60's where the mom stayed home and raised the kids, both sets of parents usually work to provide for the family. It sounds to me like both the girl and young man came from really screwed up families. The law is the law!
Posted 02/27/2010 at 01:00:06 PMThere is only one reason why a 19 year old MAN would want to date a 14 year old GIRL.
If this perv can't get someone his own age, then he has problems.
Posted 02/27/2010 at 06:01:22 PMDave: "And yes, I think a 50-y/o having sex with a 14-y/o is gross. So what? Why the hell is my opinion on whether or not its gross relevant to what two people who love each other do behind closed doors.
I also think foot fetishes are gross. Should we make it unlawful to remove socks during sex?...
If the involved parties are mature enough to consent to sex, I don't care who/what they want to have sex with. Neither should you."
I get what you are saying with this last point, but I don't think the point for any of us is condemning someone for something we think is gross, we think the aspect of it feeling gross to us is an indication that the majority actually feels it is wrong. The problem with your defining consent by when the child "feels mature enough to have sex" is that they probably aren't actually, the just FEEL that way, with the help of an adult who is manipulatively trying to seduce them, because he's been sexually active enough to have the experience/moves to get her to feel it is the right thing a lot easier than if it was her and some other peer her age stumbling in the dark having no idea what they are doing.
To me, kids should be able to explore that on their own, when they get to be between 16 and 19, or older if they deem themselves "ready" at that point. That has a beauty and certain innocence to it that cannot be equaled in such an imbalanced relationship as our example. It's not legitimate to say that a child/teenager consented when they don't really have rights as an adult in any other way either. Not only is the law written so that they cannot legally give consent until a specific age, but I support that law. Again, if you don't, do something to influence changing it, but don't just complain about it being unjust. Kids might feel they are physically ready to drive at 12 because their feet can touch the pedal, but we don't want them on the roads. Likewise, we don't want 50 year olds impregnating 14 year olds.
Posted 02/27/2010 at 08:43:02 PMDavid, this I totally take issue with:
I don't care who/what they want to have sex with. Neither should you.
This represents everything that is wrong with more libertine points of view on sex. It justifies statutory rape and bestiality. But my main problem with it is when people tell me that I should think like them. Why "should" we agree when our guts tell us it's wrong? We SHOULDN'T. Where do you get off expecting me to feel the same way, just because you can't relate to feeling any other way besides not seeing the big deal if a 50 year old and 14 year old claim to be in love.
Posted 02/27/2010 at 08:49:29 PMI believe what David is referring to is not child pornography, but simulated child pornography, because it would be animated pornography. In answer to his question, an individual is not directly hurt, but I think the assumption you're making is that having an outlet for the fantasy will release some of their need for it, and I disagree. I think what would happen if someone nurtures it with a "cleaned up" version (I hate to even say that, because it is so disgusting to me, even as fantasy where no one is attacked or molested), is that it will help the person normalize it further in their mind, and stir up the fantasies more and possibly the urges to act on them, ultimately. I see no good that could come of indulging it, trying to put myself in the pedophile's perspective as well as from a treatment aspect. People need to be treated to see how their behavior is wrong. If they can't be, which is generally the case, sadly, then I think they border on sociopathic lack of empathy. That's why rehabilitating pedophiles is so challenging, and may ultimately be impossible the majority of the time. That's what is suggested by statistical data about psychiatric treatement.
Posted 02/27/2010 at 09:08:59 PMmcr, yet again the voice of reason! Also totally agree with Shannie. Glad there are some others who agree and are actually intelligent enough to articulate it!!!
Posted 02/27/2010 at 09:11:04 PMI like most if not all of what J said. The Investigators had a show on where a psychiatrist apparently seduced a 15 yr old patient, divorced his wife and married her. She is now in jail.
If the girl was very sexually active, we'll probably never find out from the courts. But it matters.
The average age difference I've read between me and women is 3 years with the man being older. The never say what the standard deviation is.
If he just graduated high school the year previous, he might have 10 to 25 % of his friends still high school. So he might be in the same peer group as highschool girls. At 14 the girl might be in last year of middle school or 1st year of highschool. If he has a job than he would hang around more adults, If he didn't he'd hang around his recently graduated highschool friends and people still in school.
*** A senior dates a freshman and graduates. They do what many people (Planned Parenthood) tells us is inevitable. DO you jail him/her? No it is one 19 & the other 15. ***
If you say yes, how hard do you come down on a 18 to 16 year relationship. I would like to see the range of penalties some of you would support. What about 17 to 16? How ***graduated*** is your response.
Posted 02/28/2010 at 09:36:12 AMIn most states you are considered being adult at the age of 18. Nebraska is 19. You can move out, join the military, etc. but the parents are still responsible for you until you are 19 in Nebraska. The problem with this case, 1 he didn't graduate and gave up getting his GED. 2 he has no friends he hangs with. 3 Apparently his parents gave up on him. 4 he has no job and looks like no desire to get one. 5 he has depression and didn't do anything to get help. 6 BOTH lied to her parents on his age. 7 he should of manned up and turned his self in. Of course now he looks guilty. 8 he knew what he was going to do, he painted his car. 9 He is or will be in the state of Nebraska considered a criminal. 10 He sent and received obscene pictures from his phone. 11 THIS ISN'T THAILAND.
Posted 02/28/2010 at 10:58:22 AMI forgot the car part, which of course suggests premeditation.
If he is industrious enough to paint a car, it begs the question why can't he work. I know the job market is tough.
Depression would clear up if he had GED. Just a viscious cycle.
No friends, no job, no GED. He needs help and to be in prison. Not saying how long or what type, but ya, he needs to be there.
Posted 02/28/2010 at 11:13:55 AMThis will most definitely be my last post on her because you folks just don't pay attention.
Posted 02/28/2010 at 09:22:09 PMBS - This is a case in the state of IOWA, not Nebraska
The young man IS employed, has been for quite a while.
His parents NEVER gave up on him no matter what. They never will either.
He had been working on this car for two years. To paint it at the stage he had it in, would not be unusual.
The parents are the ones who ALERTED the authorities that the suicide note had been found. That is the reason anyone knew they were on the run as quickly as they did.
AND - his family will make sure he receives whatever counseling he needs and then some.
Oh, and I NEVER spoke ill of the young lady or her family. I only "spoke" on the issues I know to be true. How many of you can say that?
So he is in Iowa. He is still a sex offender no matter where he lives. B, you must be a family member with the knowledge of this case. You had to point out the female has/had a STD, so what. You call him kid, the rest call him adult, that he didn't give her the STD. He will need counseling for his behavior after he gets out of prison. I for one hope he serves at least 5 years for taking her across state lines along with other charges pending against him. You let one get away with what he has done, then others will expect the same treatment. He did this to himself. No one else.
Posted 02/28/2010 at 11:05:19 PMI am a child therapist that deals with a lot of abuse. Yes, I deal with children up to the age of 16. If only you knew how some of the kids turn out. I can say with most of the children I deal with, the parents had no idea that this was going on.
BS- Okay, you got me - just one more
Posted 02/28/2010 at 11:47:48 PMYou still aren't paying attention - I did not post anything about an STD, someone else did.
Yep, I called him a kid. At 19, sorry, but he's still a kid to me.
Also, I have ALWAYS said he needs to suffer consequences. I never said he should get off scott free. Again, you weren't paying attention and confusing posts. I also said he needs counseling and lots of it.
Whether I am family or just close to the family doesn't matter.
Good for you for helping kids who need it so much. I am sure that the families you have helped thought they were doing the best they could and your help has made them stronger and closer.
I counsel kids on a daily basis, also. I know how frustrating and rewarding it can be. I also know that consequences and earned rewards are the only ways to help them understand and grow. They have to have hope, love, and understanding in partnership with the discipline.
I really do respect that you help families and I am sure you do not use the same treatment for every situation. You tailor the approach to the family and the situation, right? If you were the counselor in this instance, would you start treating without knowing all the facts? I don't think so. I have no doubt you are better than that or you would not be in the field you are in.
Why would either of them return home when they both know the consequences he will be put through?
Posted 02/28/2010 at 11:56:13 PMShe evidentally feels love for him to leave on her own free will with him. This is something that's a big risk to happen when you press charges on a daughters boyfriend. If it had been handled in an adult manner, letting them know that because she has made adult choices to have an intimate relationship with him then she could still be going to school, the parents could continue to help both of them to be successful in their endeavors (her school, him a job). And, just treat both of them normal instead of making him out to be a sexual predator. She obviously consents to be with him, she's just as much at fault as he is. She knows what she's doing, she's not stupid. Now there's an even bigger chance she'll come back pregnant!
There is not that big of an age difference and like another person commented that for her age she may be more mature and for his age he might not be as mature. Statistically, girls mature faster than boys.I wish them all the best and wish the parents could come to terms in a positive way for them to work it out and drop those charges on him. Be mature about the situation. You can't put all the blame on the boy, but unfortunately people do.
Ponder the facts -- I agree with you mostly, mainly about the girl taking some blame here. If she really cared for him and his well being, she'd pull her head out of her ass and just let him go. Being in love at 14 sucks. Everything at 14 sucks. You're 14! You're not allowed to do any of the things you want to and you don't realize it's for your own good. Honestly, if they were to just come back, I would hope that the boy doesn't get punished too harshly. I don't think he deserves more than a few months in prison. I think the girl is likely manipulating him to do these things, and yes, he's a 19-year-old man and should know better, but when you're in love (no matter how inappropriate that love is), you want to do whatever you can to stay with that person. They're both just being really stupid here.
Posted 03/01/2010 at 12:13:40 AMB, I will hopefully get a A in class with your help.
Posted 03/01/2010 at 06:17:36 AMNow for my personal opinion, I really hope the kids come home safe. And that the families can work this out by themselves with no court involved. Good luck to the family that knows the case, stay strong and love your children.
IM ON THE COUPLES SIDE!!! WHY IS IT ILLEGAL TO DATE SOMONE WITH AN AGE DIFFERENCE? IF YOU LOVE SOMONE THEN WHY CANT YOU BE WITH THEM? THATS NOT FAIR!! I MYSELF HAVE BEEN WITH OLDER GUYS AND TO TELL YOU THE TRUTH... THEY ARE SO MUCH BETTER THEN GUYS MY AGE. THESE DAYS THEY ARE SO CHILDISH. BUT I DONT SEE ANYTHING WRONG WITH COUPLES AND BIG AGE DIFFERENCE.
Posted 03/04/2010 at 09:06:28 AMAn earlier post by Dad of Daughters expressed his opinion that, at the age of 14, Janakaye was in 7th or 8th grade. Personally, I didn't turn 15 until late in my sophomore year of high school. High school relationships are tricky when age comes into play due to a few things: time of year of birthday, people failing, etc. I know that this particular case is extreme because they fled the state, but I feel like the age gap and resulting parental/legal issues is a fairly common occurrence. It's true that not all young couples are having sex, but it does happen. It's easy to see how a 19 year old can be attracted to a 14 year old (these days, it's getting harder and harder to gauge the age of young girls with makeup and revealing clothing). To clarify, I'm not advocating sexual relationships with minors, I'm just stating that I can see how they occur between older teen males and younger teen girls. Sorry mom's and dad's, but young isn't synonymous with innocent. It's silly to think that we can keep teenagers under lock and key all the time. All we can hope is that starting at an early age they are taught to be responsible and have a high self-esteem so that they won't make bad decisions.
Posted 03/05/2010 at 02:07:21 AMOk, I think it is time for the real mothers name to come out. Maybe the reporters will correct names from the step mothers to the real mother. Everyone ready for her name? Oh, and the real story.
Posted 03/18/2010 at 09:16:34 AMman im way younger than my boyfriend.....but we havent done anything.............YET!!!!!!so what they ran away with each other!!!maybe they are in love!!!just cuz yall lifes was ruined when yall was little dont mean yall got to be dissing other pplz!!!!if i want to date i damn 49 year old man i can!!!ill see him weither my parents like it or not!!!if im old enough to be able to drive im old enough to make my own life style!!!
Posted 04/14/2010 at 04:52:35 PMBUT ANYWAYS.....BACK TO THIS THINGY!!!
i think he took her and she didnt want to go cuz if he didnt then why they runnin from the police!?!?if they in love they in love .....no one can stop someone from loving another person....i understand its against the law in some states......but it some pplz fault cuz they let these grown ass men in teen chat rooms or teens in adult chat rooms.....so you cant blame young girls for like older guys!!!
i love older guys!!!:)
What Gram says is fully true. And what is bad is that her parents know that she has been very sexually active with guys older than him. Her mom caught her in the back seat of some random guy's car and did nothing about it. Whether anyone believes this or not, she pushed herself on him. And problem being, yes he is 19 i know, but she took advantage of him. He saw that her parents never showed any care about her that he thought he could make it better for her. That's why he bought the ring, and did what she wanted to do. It's bad that her mom takes the 14 year old's sister out and spends a shit ton of money on her almost everyday and she is stuck with her sister's baby. He has been into cars all his life and that is all he has ever cared about and wanted to do. He did not even care about having a girlfriend. I really feel sorry for him because no one knows the full story of what happened. Everyone shoots out their opinion just to be heard. When he got back from Illinois, all he wanted to get back to was his car and family. When he was 16 he did a full motor swap in his 92 3000gt with no experience at all and his grandmother's help. He ran into some problems with his schooling at Treynor because he was an outsider. He changed to an alternative school so he would be with other people like himself and not be judged. Unfortunately the teacher was going through divorce problems and took her anger out on the students. He dropped out of school so he could work full time for his uncle. He is now out of his job because of this shit. He has tried at alot of things and failed. He is scared of failing again, so he doesn't want to try anymore. He is now working on getting his GED and wanting to go to Iowa Western to get a degree so he can finish his life dream of working on/building cars. He is a great kid, very hard worker and would go to the end of the earth for anyone. He even tried helping his cousin with some problems and she just basically stabbed him in the back. When he left, he felt that no one cared about him at all. He does have some anger problems but he willingly is going to therapy for it and I have noticed an improvement. He got mixed up on who really did care for him. I hope the best for you Steven. Right now its a hurry up and wait situation but I know that you can hang in there. And also her and her parents knew he was 19. He thought that she was at least 16 but it never crossed his mind to ask, he just assumed that she was of legal age.
Posted 05/01/2010 at 02:55:08 AMok well this is janakaye i think that any one who agrees with me and him being together is awesome. if you loved some oe you would do any thing for them but if you dont agree your just a dumd ass cunt that needs to get a life. it was my choice and really it none of your beezzzzeee wax. but any way any one who agrees hit me up on facebook or myspace
Posted 05/09/2010 at 01:15:50 AMfacebook:janakayelee@ymail.com
myspace:leejanakaye@yahoo.com
ok, first of all janakaye has no stds ppl r just being stupid and putting that on there thy where truly in love he proposed to her(not because her life is bad) bc he realllly loved her.she has only been sexualy active with 1 other guy then steven and she dated hin 4 3 years.he knew her age and she knew his and they didnt care they just wanted to be together he even got warned by her parents and the police b4 he got introuble with all of this. she did not have a sucide note if she did her parents would have turned it in. and once steven got arrested he told her that he wanted the ring and evey thing else back, she is trying to be happy with this situation but some times its to much for her, he shouldn't have left her since she is preggo with his baby. she is probabbly gunna keep the babby she is doing well in schol aggin nd trrying her best too bee a good mommy they both have it hard right now and need lots a supppot she stiil shys she wants too bee with him if he would every love her aggain. go back 2 her dude she would be faithful too u give her something to live for other then ur guyz child ok
Posted 05/12/2010 at 09:37:35 PMyes she is preganat bt leave her a lone steven iz nt goin 2 b a part of tht kids life she wil b a geat mother evn kno i hat her i kno she will b i had a kid whn i was 16 nd i needed a lot of support nd so will she
Posted 05/30/2010 at 09:40:30 PMhey Pete, while reading this has been educational. Ha Ha
I am noticing newer posts that claim Steven has been arrested and Janakaye is home and prego? Any chance you can use your magic for a recent/current update on this article?
Thanks
Posted 07/01/2010 at 11:55:12 AMjana actually had a abortion evedently coulnt handle it
Posted 07/02/2010 at 09:15:29 PMshe actualty got an abortion fyi
Posted 07/02/2010 at 09:19:33 PMshe had an mis caraidge dumies im her bff
Posted 07/09/2010 at 09:00:54 PM