Neighbors Who See Stabbing Kick Ass
Sara Blasse Claims She was Carjacked, Having Sex While Driving to Cover Up Theft
Friday, July 16, 2010 at 7:00 am
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Police in Chesilhurst found Blasse's 2003 Kia crashed and burning. So they naturally went to Blasse to see what was up with this whole burning car thing.
She told them she'd been carjacked by an armed gunmen. But the evidence didn't seem to fit that tale, and as you will soon find out, Blasse really sucks at lying. Police wondered why, if she was carjacked, she never called 911, even though she was later taken to a hospital for a broken hand.
So Blasse decided to change her story, this time going with the most debasing tale possible. She said she was performing felatio on her boyfriend. And due to her lip-smacking sexual prowess, her boyfriend became distracted and crashed.
Now it's embarrassing enough to offer this tale when it's actually true. But you have to be the world's greatest moron if that's the best lie you can fabricate. And that's exactly what it was, police concluded.
What really happened was that Blasse and her boyfriend stole a laptop, then crashed the car as they were eluding police. They set it on fire and took off on foot. Later that night, the boyfriend stole yet another car and set it on fire.
Blasse has since been charged with filing a false report, with more charges expected to be filed against the lovely Sara and her sweetheart.
See our last episode of stupid criminals: Moron Loses Drinking Game, Allows Friends to Set Him On Fire.
Tags: Gooberville, New Jersey
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