Meet Convicted 35-Count Rabbit Abuser
Skyler Smith Can Now Legally Pretend to Be a War Hero
Thursday, August 26, 2010 at 2:14 pm
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Skyler Smith claimed to be a hero during his Army service in Iraq and Afghanistan. When he was around other veterans in Huntsville, Alabama, he walked with a limp and liked to wear his medals -- including two Purple Hearts, a Bronze Star and a Combat Infantry Badge.
He even rode on the Purple Heart float in Huntsville's Veteran's Parade, and was about to be inducted into the American Legion's Military Order of the Purple Heart. He also used his status as a disabled vet to get a $160,000 contract with the Defense Department to provide bullet-proof vests.
But when the Legion decided to do some digging before Smith was formally inducted, it found something terribly amiss. It seems Smith not only wasn't a war hero; he was actually a cowardly douchebag who went AWOL from his unit, having fled the 82nd Airborne just as it was to be deployed to the Middle East.
He ended up being jettisoned from the Army on a "other-than-honorable" discharge.
And just as the American Legion was investigating his trail, so was the Pentagon. He'd failed to provide the vests required of his military contract. And to top it all off, Smith had sold a man a $70,000 ring, claiming it was diamond when it was really just cubic zirconia worth $13.
The swindling little bastard was arrested outside the American Legion just as he was preparing for his induction ceremony.
He was charged with fraud for the ring and the military contract capers, and was also hit with Stolen Valor charges for violating a federal law that makes it a felony to falsely claim you're a war hero, or wear medals you didn't earn.
But now it looks like he'll at least skate on the fake hero charges. An appeals court in California ruled this week that the Stolen Valor Act violates the First Amendment, since it's a restriction on speech. After all, our constitution is designed to protect all speech, even if it's utter bullshit.
One might presume the feds will appeal the ruling to a higher court, so the case is not likely over. But we'd like to know what you think, dear reader. Obviously it's a chickenshit move to claim you were a hero when you're actually the guy who ran away when things got tough. But once the government starts regulating speech, it's only a matter of time before they start banning non-bullshit speech, isn't it? (Special thanks to reader Jenn for the tip.)
UPDATE: Skyler Smith is arrested again for violating his probation.
As part of his bond for scamming the government and generally behaving like a douchebag, Smith was ordered not to be involved with government contracts. He was also required to give his email and password to his probation officer.
But when the officer checked in on Smith's correspondence, he found that our fake hero was once again trying to score contracts with the government. Emails indicate Smith has been named chief contracting officer of a company called Shadow Umbrella, which we presume does business with the Pentagon -- or at least wants to. An email from the company owner promised Smith 10 percent of the company's revenue, $10,000 a month, and a company car.
This is just a guess, but we'd be willing to bet the company owner isn't aware of Smith's recent legal history. A soon-to-be-felon rarely makes a good face of a company.
Smith tried to tell the court that he was merely reviewing the technical aspects of contracts, and wasn't actually involved with seeking them. But a judge ruled that bullshit, and ordered his ass back to jail until his next hearing.
See our last Armed Forces tale: Elaine Deering Sells War Hero Brother's Medals to Go on a Cruise.
Tags: Alabama, Armed Forces
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