Caryn E. Davis Locked Daughter in Laundry Room to Keep Her From Running Away

• KA, now that this has really come to a close, I suppose I can address your current comments. I hope you understand I couldn't before because we would have gotten nowhere considering our differing views on this situation. That being said, I can completely understand where you are coming from when you ask me to 'understand our view looking outside in'. The scary thing is that I too felt the same, and looked at things the same as you - until this incident. I don't wish it on anyone, but for anyone looking from the inside out, it is a completely different view, so let me explain a bit. Because this entire thing is so misunderstood, it's prompted me to write a book about it so others can save themselves from the same thing happening to them. The book is titled: Dead Wrong: How to protect yourself from law enforcement and the entitlement generation', if you are so inclined to get all the info I can't possibly give right here. It should be out late September and for those in Eau Claire, WI, it will for sure be at 'The Local Store' as well as on Amazon, etc. The book goes in depth as to why people plea to crimes they've never committed which will answer your question about Caryn's plea. The short of it is that even innocent people face a chance of being found guilty of something they never did. Real life isn't CSI, and the cops don't look for other people to charge when things don't go their way. The lock onto who they want to, and follow it as far as they possibly can, even if it involves making up info, as happened in our case. Also, the DA relies on the same mindset that you, and most other people have. The DA charges the person with a felony they know they will never get, just to scare the accused, and also a misdemeaner. The jury, thinking just like you, figures 'Well they don't deserve the felony but they must have done SOMETHING or they wouldn't be here, so let's give the misdemeanor'. This is one of the reasons people plea - instead of paying thousands of dollars for a trial they will probably not win because of that thought process, it's the lessor of two evils to take the plea and end the b.s. the DA is pursuing. The thing that maddens me the most is the part the police played in the entire thing. Now that I've seen the recordings of the interrogations, not once did the juvenile mention she was locked in the room. In fact she said a number of times she could always get out, and was NEVER locked in, yet the term 'locked in' found it's way into the report so they had more fuel to raid my home at 1 a.m., and better headlines for the papers, as well as this article. Also, Caryn and I NEVER lived in the same unit and have distinctly different units and the 'living together' thing was all made up by the police too, as a way to raid my home also - they need to make some connection to my house, even if feeble, to be able to get in.  Also, Caryn hasn't lost custody of her child. She gave temp custody to I think the father's distant cousins or something because that is where the juvenile was in school, making new friends, and said she wanted to stay for the school year. Also, now that the juvenile got her way with the help of the police getting her mother in trouble for nothing she did in this case, there is no guarantee that she wouldn't try it again if she didn't get her way on something else. And with most people thinking the same as you mentioned, the next time the girl calls, the cops are already going to think poorly of Caryn since she pleaded to a misdemeanor and 'must have done something' before. I played no 'loopholes' as you say. I simply stuck to my innocence and decided I will take it as far as they want to go no matter what the costs - some people don't have that luxury. I work for me, and I have whatever time I need to spend on this. That's the only way anyone would think maybe I'm not guilty, even though as you say, just being accused makes people THINK  you are. And that is DEAD WRONG. I understand the way you and a lot of others feel. But I have to do the right thing and that's why the book (Dead Wrong: How to protect yourself from law enforcement and the entitlement generation') is being written, and also why I'm filing a formal complaint with the police and fire commission in a few days. I don't expect you to believe me or change your mind. However, it would be worth following the complaint, and getting a copy of the book if you want one. I'm working on building a new website 'www.RandyGanther.com' and that should be functional in mid August. If you contact me there, I will send you a free copy.

• In my opinion, windows sealed shut and putting up bars is a the same thing as locking someone in a room.

• You clearly have a problem with Caryn.  Is it because she has worked as a stripper?  Because many of us do not believe there is anything at all wrong with making your money that way.  Is it because she explored sex with different men?  Many of us believe that two consenting adults exploring sex is not immoral, nor is it not a crime. I have never worked as a stripper, but, I don't judge others who do. Many of us have explored different drugs at one time or another.  If you haven't, good for you.  You may be the "perfect" mother in your own eyes, but I am sure you have your share of faults as well.  Being extremely judgemental about people who explore sex and drugs is apparently one of them. Also, you let the whole world know the juvenile daughters' name which is thoughtless, at best. My guess is you want everyone to believe that you "in the know" about this family. But, posting her name is very irresponsible!

• So you played the loop holes in the system and had the charges dismissed, but keep in mind that people will always suspect you played some role in these crimes, considering you were living with the victim and mother, you know more then of course you will ever lead us to believe, but that’s fine.  You noted in early post that Caryn was also innocent, but records show she pled out for lesser charges and performed community service.  So my question if nothing happened as you state, why where her charges not dismissed?  My other question for you is if she is guilty, why are you involved with someone who lost custody of their child for neglect?  I don’t know you, there for I will not judge you, but please understand our view looking outside in?

• As promised, here are the results of this case: FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE: Local Author Vindicated of 2010 Felony Allegation Eau Claire, WI – 22APR11 – The State of Wisconsin has just dismissed all charges against local author and motivational speaker, Randy Ganther, stemming from an August 2010 incident involving a juvenile’s claims of abuse against her mother, and the attachment of Ganther to that incident as ‘a party to the crime’. Ganther was never accused by the juvenile of any wrongdoing, and attached as ‘a party to the crime’ by the lead officer in the investigation, Brandon Dohms. In the 2010 incident, the juvenile, after learning her mother had transferred her from North High to Memorial, alleged her mother had neglected her by locking her in a laundry room. The night of the complaint, both Ganther and Davis’ separate homes were raided by the Eau Claire Police Department in the middle of the night resulting in both of them spending a night in the county jail. Ganther is pursuing a formal complaint with the Eau Claire Police and Fire Commission alleging police misconduct by the officers involved in the raid. “Not only was obvious vindicating evidence overlooked by the police, I’m confident the search was not only carried out in a reckless manner, but also went above and beyond the scope of the warrant”, Ganther stated. He went on to state, “This entire matter could have been over at the initial contact, had the lead officer chosen to see the big picture, saving the taxpayers of Eau Claire an untold amount of money.” Ganther has been consulting with a Madison-based attorney regarding a civil suit against the City of Eau Claire. Ganther, an author, has also just inked a book deal to document the details of this case, with his agent Greenbrier Entertainment, based near Minneapolis, MN. ###

• A child in a good home with good communication does not run away four times. There is more to this story. She probably needs to be placed with relatives (who are TRUSTWORTHY) until this situation can be investigated.

• KA - Trying to figure out your message. What does 'court date punl' mean?

• 15days in Jail or 120hrs of CS, what a joke, Makes me wonder if Caryn slept with the Judge??? No surprize with the court system, they should made an example out of Caryn, she's been a terrible mother and only gets a slap on the wrist, but in due time, she'll slip up again, and maybe a plea bargain won't be there to snake her way out. Poor Janee, has losers for parents and really never stood a chance, being left alone night after night while mom was at the strip club,doing drugs, drinking and all the different men that came through her life, no wonder Janee's has problems. Randy you must be a real winner too, involved with a cunt like Caryn, fucking Moron, goodluck at your court date punl...lol

• If you get into the history of this family, the girl has run away a few times now. Last time she was gone for a month, and had her family all over the news looking for her. I'd say the means used to keep her home were justified. So long as she was fed and kept warm in sanitary conditions, what was left for this mother to do? The state won't step in without legal cause and what mother would allow her child to keep running away just so the state would take them away? A bad parent, that's what kind.

• Janet, I know of a friend who is a cop and back when the seatbelt violation couldn't be enforced by itself, he said he's stop someone he knew didn't have the seatbelt on and say, 'Hi sir, I noticed your tire pressure in your rear tire was low, and...oh, and I see you aren't wearing your seatbelt either, I'll have to cite you for that.' He could get away with that because probable cause is like saying that someone who has a grain of sand in their house, must be guilty of owning an hourglass. Let's say you were near the scene of a crime where, an hour prior, John Doe was murdered, and you were questioned by cops later, and you told them 'I don't know why anyone would kill him, nobody really liked him, I didn't like him either, but I'd never kill him.' Here's what the DA would tell the jurors: 'Janet stated she was at the crime scene, AND she even said 'I didn't like him...' So ladies and gentlemen, you can see that she was there that night, AND she had a motive...' Don't think that happens? Guess again. Like I've mentioned, there are numerous lies in the police report by, both the minor and the officer writing it. Even after the raid of the house, and seeing that some things the minor said couldn't possibly be true, these items were left in the report. Why that is, is anyone's guess. It's unfortunate these false statements are in there. It makes it much harder to see the truth because now the DA is obligated to try to save face by finding some way to use this misinformation instead of actually trying to figure out if a crime has been committed. It's really as if it's more 'guilty until proven innocent' since none of the officer's information has to be verified to charge someone these days. I'm sure when this is all done you'll find out more of what really happened. All I can say is pay attention to the news and papers when it's all over, and you'll see what the REAL story is.

• Randy, if Caryn did not make her use a bucket as a toilet, why did Caryn say that there was nothing wrong with it because it was like when you go camping?

• Everyone seems to be saying how the mother is right. Most appear to be mothers of teens themselves. Yet, each parent out there has once been a teen themselves, and once understood all of the pain and angst and rebellion it comes with. That mother was completely in the wrong. There are many options she could have taken other than locking her child in a laundry room. Windows can be sealed or nailed shut, bars can be put up, alarm systems installed, babysitters hired, perhaps therapy, or even incarceration. But a homemade prison cell is completely inappropriate. You simply can't take the law into your own hands.

• Randy, you will notice, that as do you, I as well post under my given name. I've nothing to hide, I've never been arrested, though I have been in handcuffs!! *evil grin* Even if KA would not be comfortable posting who he/she is on a public forum, it shows in bad taste and ill-character to make constant negative remarks about someone yet not give that individual the due process of knowing not only who their accuser is but also the ability to defend against the accusations. It is so written in our court systems, though that is not always what transpires. KA may have valid points, Caryn may not have always been the best person. We all make bad decisions and do stupid things as we grow as a person. Hopefully, and it would seem this is true with Caryn, we learn from our mistakes so as not to repeat them. Like the grass and trees, we are a constant growing and evolving thing, very few people are who they were decades ago. KA may have known Caryn when she was still learning from her mistakes and making them. From your descriptions of Caryn now, she has evolved into a positive person who does not desire for her child the same life style choices she had previously made. Yes, she needs to own her mistakes, accept them and pray she never repeats them. Then she needs to sit down with Miss Thang and apologize for all the negative things the child may have witnessed as those may be the root cause for why she is acting out. Though her acting out is still not excusable. Caryn seems to be a genuinely concerned mother and her past transgressions, no matter what they may be, should not be a reason to judge who she is now or question her intentions with her child. To the naysayers who keep bringing up the past transgressions and mistakes made by Caryn, as the bible states, 'Judge not lest ye be judged.' 'Let he is without sin caste the first stone.' It seems as if Eau Claire, WI has a few people who are purer than our Savior. He forgave and looked past the previous sordid life and colorful background of not only Mary Magdalene but that of Rahab a known harlot. So if Christ is able to forgive the sinners how can we not do the same.

• All, Last night I'm working on an assignment for school about work place violence, and I came across this web site and found this forum about Caryn, Randy and Janee. I never participate in forums, but in this case I need to add my two cents, because I think some people are painting a bad picture of Caryn's character and abilities to parent her daughter. I spent almost three years living with Caryn and Janee, during which time; Janee was active in Church on Wednesday nights, Girl Scouts, and Camps etc. Caryn always followed up with Janee's school work and attended her plays, Xmas sings, etc. Like any mother Caryn would have to remind her to brush your teeth and hair, take a shower, don't wear those clothes and like many children, they'd fight you tooth and nail, so I'm confident that she was well taken care of, and if Janee has grown to be strong minded and stubborn like Caryn, well I bet she's a hand full. The entire BS about her sexual habits has no business being mentioned on here as it has nothing to do with the case in point. "Enough said about that" Caryn had Janee at a very young of age "19" I think, so she was just a baby herself, and raising a child. I think Caryn's done a good job as a mother, considering the non existed relationship she had with her mom. I have nothing to gain or lose by my statements, but hope that Caryn and Janee can get past these issues and began to enjoy life again. AS we all know too well, it's short. Good Luck To all three of you. "You live longer once you realize that any time spent being unhappy is wasted." ~Ruth E. Renkl

• Annie, on the 11th I started a post that said, 'One last one for KA until he/she decides to come out from behind the mask. (The Wizard of Oz was also very tough until Toto revealed what was behind the curtain).' I can't find it now, but I also ended one that stated something to the effect of 'we aren't going to solve anything here'. You'll notice that since that time I've agreed with you 100% and have made no further response to this 'mystery person'. You're ABSOLUTELY right. KA seems like the kind of person who would still look at a verdict of 'not guilty' and find some reason why there's still a problem. Now it's just time for patience. I'm happy to say it's already under way with the pretrial done yesterday, and the return date coming up in early October. The truth will speak louder than anything else.

• Randy: Show yourself to be the bigger & better person & make no further responses to KA. It seems KA is only trying to goad you into a further discourse that need not be fought in this arena. @KA: I concur 100 times with JJ.

• I would have to say that my daughter is only 10 and having those kinds of decisions to make are touph. I know how I was as a teen.. Everything was sooo dramatic. So important and for alot of it me, me, me. I knew it ALL they knew nothing. It is hard to be a child in this day and time, making it that much harder to be a parent.

• I understand corporal punishment seemed to "work" back in the day, but the problem is how far it can go. My father (one of 12 siblings) tells the story of his father loosing his grip on his children when many of them were teens. My grandfather actually took a gun to one of my aunts. My father, also a teen at the time, stood up to my grandfather (who was also an alcoholic) and this took the pressure off my aunt which was my father's goal. As the story goes, my father had to hid in the barn for a couple of days until he finally jumped down one day when grandpa was gone. He had broken his ankle but had to hike a couple of miles to his cousin's house for help with his broken ankle. There is a big difference between fear and respect.

• Okay, I'm 22 years old and I'll tell you what, I "ran away" when I was 15 (well, not really my parents just couldn't find me), but basically after they called the cops, and they called my school, and the friends I was not only mortified, but when I really did make it home, I was whooped! You know what, when you think only of yourself and put your family through hell, you deserve a beating...I had bruises all over my butt, but I never ran away again...Personally, I think if cops don't want to do anything, they should stay out of the parents lives when the kids get a beating...go back to the days of old when our parents and grandparents were being brought up...and you best believe if your child says to you "if you hit me I'll call the cops", you hand their asses the phone, whack 'em one anyways and say "Go ahead you little brat"...I never threatened the cops to my parents, children need to learn respect now a days...put the fear of "the higher being" (didn't want to offend anyone) into them before they become teens, and you'll be fine... But as for this situation, I wouldn't like it, but if the punishment had been the same since she was 4, it obviously isn't working, think of something else....as for the boyfriend, he's just a boyfriend, who is he to tell the mom how to raise her daughter, I think all the charges should be dropped against him, because he did what was right, and stood back and let the mother do what she did...

• JJ, I never claimed to be perfect,nor am I, but abusing my child I would never do. I'm simply showing a pattern of how Caryn's life has effected Janee's furture. Caryn's always dated losers and is confused why her child hangs around losers?? If the shoe fits.

• KA, YOU MUST be a perfect person. Why, I bet you never even drive 1 mph over the speed limit, or have never performed an unkind act on anyone. (You posts prove this to not be true). In my opinion, what you are doing (knocking someone who is down even farther down) will come back to you at the time when you need it least. When that happens you will think of this post a say to yourself "Now I understand how it feels" and you may just grow some compassion.

• Randy, I am not angry or jealous, you are mistaken, but rather trying to show a trend of Caryn's behaviorial problems from the past and current, which you have done a great job of defending her, excuse after excuse. So let's chat again, after the hearing and see how a jury of her peers considers how Caryn's past has nothing to do with this event. Randy do you have children of your own?

• Cassandra, Your first few lines really took me back to the beginning of all of this and I can say I completely understand where you are coming from. These were Caryn's feelings as well. While her daughter was never locked in the room as alleged, Caryn asked the cops the exact same thing - 'now that you've brought her back, what is to keep her from running again?' The answer was generally, 'if she runs again, just call us'. The problem was that every time they were called (four additional times) they wouldn't check to see where she was unless we had 'credible' information she was where we said she would be at that exact time. She always carried her cell phone, but they said it was too hard to get a search warrant to locate the phone to locate a runaway unless she 'was in danger', yet they seemed to get a warrant to search my house pretty easily. Apparently they think that she's in danger in my home even though she's RARELY ever there, and ALWAYS supervised. They must not think she's in any danger when she runs, and is at the home of her friends, overnight, and with no parental supervision. Something isn't quite right, is it? There was one officer who actually checked out a lead and stayed in the area until he found her walking behind houses. I wish more were like him. I'd mention his name here but he just may not want it on here, even though he DOES deserve credit. We were told we couldn't get her into the juvi system until she committed a 'real' crime, and not just the drug offenses, or 'obstructing a peace officer', type offenses she has already committed. I've heard some officers in larger cities say you can go up to the point of death as long as it's REQUIRED for DISCIPLINE or your own self defense. Then again, the officer (Brandon Dohms, at the Eau Claire Police Department - young and with no children) decided to listen to what Caryn's daughter was saying, and he was one who believed (from the statements he made to us) that a parent can't touch a child at all, under any circumstances. It really leaves a parent to guess as to what they can do. Unfortunately it seems there are no set laws or rules and it's determined rather, by what officer you come in contact with - one who has kids and understands that a 'spanking' is o.k., or one who thinks your child can rule the house. I don't know what to tell you, but I feel for your situation. Best of luck!

• I am on line right now searching for WHAT I LEGALLY CAN DO TO to keep my 14 yr old daughter from running away,. The sheriffs just returned her to me last night at ten p,m,i said shell just run again,,i checked on her every hour,,the hour between 430am and 5 30 she bolted,,,can i shackle her to me>>? i know i cant to a bed or anything but if juvenile hall will not take her,,and she is my responsibility shouldnt i be able to do at least what they do,,>>? i mean really they protect them and hold us accountable (not them) for their behavior and actions..why should they stop doing what they do im the one who suffers..its a fucked up systemm....i feel for the mom,,,punished for actually giving a shit about her kid,,

• Although the way in which she is stating it IS irrelevant and disappointing what her mother was like in the past IS relevant to what this child is experiencing now. Shame on you Randy, the only person that matters here is the Daughter, you should be questioning the Mother as to WHY she's making these accusations, it's unfair to blame all of it on the child, clearly she learned much of this from the parent, you've stated as much just by yourself, the parent HAS a troubled history and now the way in which she treated her child is coming back on her. I am not advocating that the Mother should be locked up or even that she did all of what is being said but that there is ALWAYS truth in lies, especially with a child whom suffered some form of abuse, there is some truth to what the child is saying and a REASON for her acting out. I hope and pray that the three of you can move on from this when all is said and done and if all is cleared I hope the Mother in this case can learn to try and understand her child and get help with her child instead of just reacting or behaving as if she has nothing to do with the behavior of this girl. You should know as much as that Randy, regardless of how KA is feeling or how the child is feeling you can not blame all of this on that child no matter how vicious this might seem she still is a child. I do not believe the Mother is now the monster being portrayed but I do not believe the matter of her past has been handled properly in regards to her child. In other words, if the Mother doesn't get some drastic help in re-connecting with her child her child will be lost forever and NO DECENT parent wants to lose a child no matter how messed up the kid might be.

• One last one for KA until he/she decides to come out from behind the mask. (The Wizard of Oz was also very tough until Toto revealed what was behind the curtain). My intent here is not to argue with anyone or defame anyone. Unfortunately it does seem that KA is very angry or jealous or something. Once again, I'm very sorry for whatever has happened to you in your past that has made you this way. All of us have done some things that we aren't proud of. I'm no exception and I'm not claiming to be an angel. These things also do not mean this is the person we are today. As Mark stated so well, and the way that I took those comments, is that things are not always as they appear. My focus here is to comment on the facts of this case. Apparently KA wants to do bring things up irrelevant items from someone's past, that have nothing to do with the present. To answer the question about my speeches and Jesus talk, if Janee didn't get the love she needed years ago, then as I have stated, I haven't been around all of her life. I can't help that I didn't know her until just recently. As far as Caryn dating married men, I know there was one person she dated just prior to us meeting who lied to her that he was getting a divorce and yes, she believed him. I don't condone that, but I think we've all believed the lies of someone else in the past, and I don't think anyone should be condemned for mistakenly trusting someone. If there were other incidents, these certainly happened prior to her and I meeting. Perhaps you know so much because you were with her when it happened, making you guilty also. Perhaps, if you knew Caryn so well, you were friends and you encouraged her to do some of the things she's done in the past. Perhaps you two did a lot of the same things together, and you are jealous she's moved on. Obviously you hold a lot of anger towards her, and it seems as if it's eating you up inside. Even if all of this is true, I wouldn't bring these things up about your past when it has nothing to do with your present situation. Unless you come forward as to who you are, we can only speculate where your anger comes from, and dwelling on this is doing no one any good. Again, feel free to call me if you are interested in not having anyone else know who you are. jj, thanks for the well-wishes. This is certainly not a position (taking up time and money) that anyone wants to be in. I hope no one else ever has to go through this.

• 1st to all, I am not angry, far from it, but Randy you claim to be this big motivation speaker, where were your big speeches and Jesus talk when Janee needed it? I think you don't know Caryn as well as you think!! Ask her about her five abortions, and the 100 plus men and women shes had sex with. It sure looks like she's changed from her past ways lol,with new charges and others pending she's doing great, but she's your GF so I understand you defending her. Where there's smoke there fire. Did Caryn ever tell you she broke into her parents home and stole items for drug money, bet not, or that she sleeps with married men, her boy friend's- buddies and her girl friend's boy friends. Good luck Chuck

• JJ, I have the correct person, including DOB, mailing address, adoptive parents name, she is was originally from (Korea), so based from the mug shot above,I have the correct ID.

• Great point Mark. In fact, I can tell by your posts that you are a truly caring and considerate person with a lot of insight. Your comments are definitely appreciated by me.

• Granted I know nothing about Caryn, but to play Devil's Advocate here, one's Public Record is not necessarily an indicator of who they are (or even who they were). I used to have a perfectly flawless and clean Public Record. All it took was having poor judgment in my choice of girl-friends (who turned out to be Bat-shit crazy with Borderline Personality Disorder) to tarnish that record. My Public Record in the wake of that bad relationship now shows: Two Restraining Orders (both were eventually proven in Court to be issued under false pretense and dismissed and the person who filed them was found guilty of Perjury, but that doesn't matter to your Public Record). One Violation of a Restraining Order (because I sympathetically let her in from the rain to use my phone in my own apartment. I was later found Innocent in Court and even the responding Officers testified on my behalf). One Contempt of Court (the only thing I've ever truly been Guilty of...because although I had upheld the spirit of the law when I let my psycho-ex into my own apartment to use the phone, I was breaking the letter of the law when a Trial was pending by having contact with the person who was the presumed victim at the time. I got 40 hours of Community Service for not following the Judge's words explicitly to the letter.) Two 4th Degree Assaults (because I spit on someone who was physically pummeling me while they were attempting to hinder the placement of a Minor Child according to a Court Order. Both charges were dropped as the D.A. realized I had committed no wrong-doing.) Three Judgments for Collections (because my ex drained our Bank Accounts when we broke up even after I had my name taken off the account she continued to bounce dozens of checks...and since she didn't have a job they decided to go after me for what she had done even though I was no longer on the account). So, from my Public Record I'm a pretty horrible guy...never mind that before the breakup with the ex I had no problems with the law, and in the decade after the breakup with the ex I have had no problems with the law...or that I learned my lesson and stopped dating women who would later turn out to be bat-shit crazy...or that I once worked in Law Enforcement (I worked for the local Sheriff's Office doing Search & Rescue)...or that I was only found Guilty of Contempt of Court (the Probation Officer laughed and told me that their favorite TV character had accumulated 13 Contempt of Court charges in just that Season alone) or that I'm probably the most passive, congenial, polite, and honest person anyone could hope to meet. My Public Record shows that I'm a violent and abusive dirt-bag scum when I can honestly say I have never harmed another living soul. And that isn't even taking into consideration that people do make mistakes that cause them to run afoul of the law. All it takes, in the case of Caryn, is getting intoxicated and making one bad choice to drive under the influence of alcohol to get a DUI, especially after hitting a hydrant and driving off. That means you probably should have your Driver's License suspended until you have proven you won't make a bad judgment while intoxicated ever again, but it doesn't make you necessarily a bad mother. Although the D.A. will undoubtedly run with that Public Record to paint her as a bad mom, they really aren't indicative of such. Public Record does not necessarily equal who a person is, or what kind of person they are. /end_Devil's_Advocate

• Randy, Caryn and daughter, I wish you the best possible outcome from this can of worms. I'm praying for all 3 of you. KA ~ wow. You are one angry woman. Sounds to me like you are jealous of Caryn ~ that she had a troubled past, and now she has turned it around and has a good man who supports her. Of course I have no idea if this is true, but it sounds like that to me. FactFinder, lots of people have the same name so you could be mistaken. I am waiting to hear your response to what Randy pointed out. Guess you are without any sin since you are so ready to throw stones? Some Christian you are ~ hypocrite!

• FactFinder, I need you to get an address for me. I can't seem to get the information myself, and they are ignoring me.

• Randy, I am a PI and work primary through WI and MN, I'm very capable of sourcing work employment, court records, privous owned cars etc, its my job to know, my fact are in order and I have no reason to constre my resources to you.

• I'm going to side with Randy on this one. By the by it doesn't sound at all like she was "locked in the home" and had to use a "bucket" for a bathroom. I would, however agree that if this was the case it was an extreme measure. I may agree with KA and even others' in harassing this Mother if this girl were quite a bite more underage, if she were 10 or 9 or if she was solely the victim in all of this but even without Randys' statements we're not hearing the whole story. In todays' society a parents' reach can only stretch so far and though I agree we NEED to take personal responsibility for our kids we can't always be the perfect parents, all of us make mistakes and we have to accept that about ourselves and do our best. I haven't heard(just the allegations) anything that states she was down-right abusive to her 15 year old, all i've heard were allegations that her child was a problem child and she feared her running away(again without either Randy or KA's statements) this is what has been reported, no more no less. If it is the case that the Mother WAS abusive to this girl then there is no excuse for it, however, throwing guilt at her when we don't know the full situation... If you think a TEENAGER can't be a problem, you're wrong, although I generally side on the err of the parent(of which I do so in this case as well) I don't think its' JUST the parent. I want to take a moderate approach here and blame both based on what I hear from both sides(Randy and the 15 year olds' alleged behavior since KA won't name herself). Based on Randys' statement(who HAS identified himself and it has been confirmed or so it seems) it sounds like Caryn HAD had issues in the past, whether this is prevalent now or not is missing the point. Thus I would state that much of this behavior(not all) alleged to be enacted by the child IS a result of the Parents' previous life. Such a thing can not necessarily vindicate her of her actions now but at least we can identify and understand. So, we can work from this angle. So we'll say the Mother HAS changed, now shes' reacting. Is it truly fair to simply assume that her Daughter is just out of control? I would say her Daughter is merely playing out the aggression she'd grown used to, whether her Mom changed or not this IS the case. In which case I state that it is not "all of the Mothers or Daughters' fault" but BOTH of their fault. This is a case where the Mother and Daughter need to sit their ass down and figure out how they're going to work this out, Caryn needs to take responsibility for her child and admit her wrong-doings(even you must note this Randy as you elude that she HAS had a troubled history). Its' not fair to persecute either side but try and understand, otherwise it will only get worse. Right now it doesn't matter who wins' or loses because BOTH will lose in this case no matter the outcome, both sides will be lost in the feigned attempt and getting justice, the Mother will never admit wrong-doing(if she can't come to her Daughter) and the Daughter will continue to act the way she acts. If you really do care for Caryn(as it seems you do) then tell her she needs to get off her ass and start fessing up to her screw-ups in the past and work on a plan to bring them back together instead of letting this nail drive them further up. It doesn't matter who is at fault at this point or what evidence there is in either side, the Daughter is still hurting and the Mother(as it seems) is in denial. Can you honestly tell me, Randy, that Caryn isn't a bit skippish about her past-life? That she really has become the blessed saint and deserves NO blame in ANY of this? I'm working on the basis of what WAS, which sounds like what the Daughter is doing as well. When you are hurt as a child by a parent it doesn't just go away when the parent stops doing it, it stays and festers until it explodes. Counseling. Family Counseling. Emotional and Spiritual healing. This is only from my own personal experience, I know what its' like to know someone who won't admit what they've done to themselves and to others', it isn't easy to deal with and not everyone makes it out OK.

• One more quick one for KA's comment that I must have missed. First, I didn't understand what you meant by it being a 'privation' to raise a child. I've never heard that one. Also, I'm sorry for your past emotional scars as a child also. It's obvious that you have suffered greatly at some point in the past. The comments about Jenna and the clinic are obviously exaggerations meant to take out your anger on, and harm someone else. For some reason you seem to have a need to project your own inner anger on others, and that's unfortunate. This is what contributes to part of the problem with people being unjustly accused. I'm responding to this because you must be a real person, but if you don't say who you are, you realize you can't really be taken seriously. If you don't want to leave your name here, and if you know Caryn as you purport to, then you must know me also. Please do give me a call personally to let me know your feelings. If you know me, you know I will be open minded and won't judge you. I think you would feel differently if you knew the facts of this case. I would not pretend to defend anyone's past, immoral, or destructive actions. In Caryn's case, I've known her for three and a half years and in that time she has only shown a propensity to move her life in the right direction, and has been a wonderful person. All I can comment on is the Caryn that I know. As a motivational speaker, one of the things I teach is that we have to stay away from the 'dream stealers', or the people who don't let us pursue our dreams. One of the biggest problems is that we pigeon-hole people based on how we first met them, and don't allow them to change into a different, better, person. We can't fathom that the person who owns the million dollar company is the same kid who sat in 6th grade classes drooling on himself. If we don't open our minds to the fact that people can move on, we limit that person's success by holding them back. If we don't give people a chance to move forward, what good are we to anyone. If no one gave the little grade school kid named Bill Gates a chance to show he was not just a geek, we wouldn't be typing these messages out. Perhaps if you knew Cayrn today, you'd have a different opinion. Best, Randy

• Mark, thanks for the comments. You're 100% right about the situation with our system. I suppose it's in place because it does serve a purpose in most cases, it's just unfortunate when an innocent person has to spend a night in jail in the 'presumed guilty orange', and be subject to that wonderful jail-house breakfast. dD, I know it isn't clear by the headline on this article, but these charges are pending, and no one has been convicted. I noticed you stated that '...I'm sorry but locking a child in a laundry room certainly doesn't accomplish that. IF ANYTHING it causes mental trauma and anxieties.' I agree that would be the case IF it happened. Remember, this is what the child has alleged. She also said she was locked in other rooms that don't have locks which doesn't seem to make a lot of sense. In fact in the police report it even states that she always 'had access to the outside' since one door is always open to the outside. Therefore she could never have been locked in. If you hadn't read my earlier post, it may shed a bit of light on that area. FactFinder, I too searched the WI courts and didn't seem to find what you found. I have nothing to hide here, but it seems that you are misstating what you indicate are facts. Please do shed light on where you find employment history in the WI courts information. Also, as far as the public court records (current era - post 2001) are concerned, '07 shows a seat belt violation, '08 shows three financial issues (probably not all that uncommon in today's economy ya think?), '10 shows the two current allegations, one 'hit and run' and one DUI. All of the '10 allegations are pending. The hit and run involves a fire hydrant, and the DUI doesn't indicate 'drugs' or any other particular substance so I'm interested in knowing where your 'facts' are coming from. Both of the later mentioned allegations are still pending, and for good reason, so why you choose to 'convict' before having the facts is beyond me. Please do follow the fire hydrant and DUI case, and I'm pretty sure you will be amazed at the outcome of those also (there is video evidence that will show her innocence on the last two items but I can't comment further at this point since the case is still pending). As for 'FactFinder's' comment about needing Jesus, I agree. We all could use a bit of Jesus. In fact, let me pass on one of my favorite bits of Jesus to you. Luke 6:41 "Why do you look at the speck of sawdust in your brother's eye and pay no attention to the plank in your own?" Best, Randy

• Raising a child is a privation, not a right; this woman will hopefully be locked up like she's done for years with her own daughter. Randy you're an idiot to be with Caryn, you're just as sick as her to defend and justify her actions. Caryn has had more dick then Jenna Jameson and had more abortions then a clinic, she's a sick person, you wonder why her daughter is messed up when mom brings home new guys every night, or is it girls again? Who knows she's by one month and back with guys the next, great role model for your daughter, she lies, cheats, steals been fired from every job job, yes!!! I know this woman, unfortunately and I'm too embarrassed to put my name on here having been associated with her, yuck!!!! :(

• The right thing? Since when is locking a child in a laundry room and only allowing her out to do chores a proactive way to solve the problem? It's like simply covering it with a band aid..She thinks that locking this girl away is going to make her NOT run off? How about therapy? How ABOUT LISTENING to why this 15 yr old feels the urge to run away from her mother? Yeah there's nothing to say she was previously abused but it's probably not fair to just assume this 15 yr old was a delinquent and was running away just for freedom to do things her mother didn't like. The root cause of the situation needs to be addressed and I'm sorry but locking a child in a laundry room certainly doesn't accomplish that. IF ANYTHING it causes mental trauma and anxieties. I don't want to offend...but I would like to know if the people that are writing on this forum that AGREE with the way this mother conducted herself...do you also agree with spanking a child?

• She was right She is trying to raise this child She is doing the best she can and now is being punished Later we'll read another story and someone will say my God where are the parents Well here is one trying to do the right thig

• Interesting story to read and that Randy made a case for himself. Well I researched the WI courts on Caryn Davis, and to no surprise, she currently was arrested for Drugs and a hit and Run, worked as a stripper at Shooters and has had multiple run in with the police. This girls father, well he's a model citizen too, battery and assault, drugs charges etc. I feel it's safe to say the girl hasn't had an easy childhood and could explain why she's run away 4 times. Although no one will truly know all the facts here, this child lying or not needs help getting her life in order, without the help of her parents, who have failed at raising her. One last note to Randy, you indicated that you've been trouble free with the law, (round of applause for you) that doesn't make you a good person. You and Caryn need Jesus

• @Randy, it is nice to hear the "other" side of the story. There is always another side, but it is rare for it to ever be publicly heard. FYI, in the United States you can be arrested for absolutely no reason whatsoever, no matter how outstanding and innocent of a person you may be. You cannot be held for longer than 24 hours (72 hours if arrested after the Courts close on the Friday before a 3-day Weekend) without charge, but to be arrested requires absolutely no reason. An arrest therefore does not imply wrong-doing. As far as Search & Seizure goes, all it takes is reasonable suspicion, which the statement (false or not) of a witness, or the observation of a L.E.O. is all it takes for a Judge to sign a Search Warrant. Likewise the determination of Guilt or Innocence does not fall upon Law Enforcement. Especially in Domestic calls, a L.E.O. (especially in smaller population centers) will err on the side of caution and arrest to let the Courts sort it all out rather than worry about whether someone is telling the truth or a lie. That's just the way it works the moment Law Enforcement comes into the equation. As you have been charged with Misdemeanor you get the benefit of your Trial being heard before a Judge rather than a Jury. This is a good thing because most Judges have heard it all before. They are pretty good at being able to distinguish B.S. and have a low-tolerance for lies in their Courtroom. As long as you show respect and patience in Court, the Truth will be on your side. Caryn, facing a Felony is going to have a little more of an uphill battle as her Trial will be heard by a Jury of her Peers. Her lawyer will be able to stack half of the Jury with sympathetic parents, but Jurors don't generally have the experience that Judges have in being able to easily distinguish a Tall Tale from the Truth. Hopefully though, the Truth will be self-evident and will prevail. In either case, the District Attorney may never let the case go to Trial. If there does not appear to be enough evidence to warrant a Conviction, or if the majority of evidence proves the Defendant's assertion (and innocence) they will drop the charges entirely. However, most D.A.s won't drop charges until the morning of the scheduled Trial date to provide time for new evidence to come forward. From the statements you have made here, I would suspect such to happen (although that doesn't keep them from offering a Plea Bargain to your lawyer either. If you and your lawyer feel you have a strong case, then simply don't take it. District Attorneys are renown for trying to Plea Bargain out a case they plan on dropping any way). As far as public opinion goes, I was pretty much on on the parental side of this fence to begin with, but after hearing the other side of the story I'm even more so. It sounds like it shouldn't be difficult for a Judge or a Jury to come to the same conclusion. It sounds like you and Caryn have a long road ahead of you in an attempt to get her child back on the right path. Hopefully, she will learn that she cannot manipulate others by using the law like a weapon against them to get what she wants. I hope that there ends up being a happy ending for all three of you somewhere down the road. All I can say is don't give up hope and hang in there.

• Good luck Randy! I SOOOO understand the pain and frustration you and Caryn are experiencing and I feel for you. Remember, this too, shall pass. My son put me through HELL during his teen years and beyond. Finally, at the age of 22 and after being busted while on probation, he is towing the line! He is working full time and is off drugs and alcohol. He even quit cigarettes. We get along great and I feel he really appreciates me and my advice. Let me tell you this was a long time coming! I hope there is a time when Caryn's daughter looks back on this and realizes how much her mother cares about/loves her. Everyone who is a parent realizes that if the parent didn't care, they would do nothing. Again, the best of luck to you and your family. BTW, I am not a religious person, but I am spiritual. And, prayer, I believe, has helped bring my teens around numerous times ~ like an unbelievable miracle.

• First of all, THANKS to all of you with such an open mind and not 'convicting' without getting the facts. Let me quickly comment on what the 'IowaGrammy' says is the 'cheesy grin' mugshot. I understand the comments on both sides and I have no ill will toward those who don't like it. First, I think a smiling picture, no matter where it's taken, looks much better than the 'presumed guilty' look of the typical mug shot. Second, my parents taught me to smile, so that's what I do. Even in the worst of situations I try to always keep a smile. When you're thrown in jail for a night for something you never did, that may be all you have. That's simply all there is to that. If you haven't yet figured out my name matches the one under the mug shot, well now you know why I'm qualified to give you some facts. That being said, I challenge 'janet', who calls herself a 'friend of the family', to come forward and reveal who you really are if you have the cajones, which I highly doubt. Oh, and if you're such a friend of the family, why would you wait 12 years to bring this up if 'it's been going on since she was 4'? Or, is it more that you are a friend of the juvi, and you have an ulterior motive to get her away from her mother? Here are the simple facts that should answer most of your questions: - two years ago this juvenile was an A/B student - last year she started hanging with the wrong kids, having sex, doing drugs (failed tests her mother gave her), drinking - even in school, skipping days of school at a time by forging her fathers signature, calling in to excuse herself, lying that she was her mother, and running away (four times)- the real reason was that her mother wouldn't let her get away with everything she was doing - not because the home was so bad. - last year she finished with all Fs and Ds - when her mother noticed her first 'D' she talked to the school counselor, who told her, in front of this juvenile, that it was no big deal, and 'that happens even to good students' Thanks for the help Mr. counselor. - The mother has been trying to get help from the 'system' and as many of you have stated, it is very hard. She's done everything she possibly can think of, and like 'cbabyrko' says, the mother has been told they won't do anything unless the kids commit a 'real' crime. - because of the way this juvenile ended the school year, her mother transferred her to another school - the juvi in the past made the statement that if she was transferred to a different school she would, 'do whatever it takes to not go to (the other school). - now we know what she meant. - the day the juvi found out she was transferred, she posted on her Facebook site, 'Caryn Davis is a stupid cunt. I'm going to (the school she was enrolled in) - then she made up abuse allegations to the police, presumably because the juvi thought she would then be able to live with whomever she wanted, in the district of the school of her choice. - the first four police, involved in the first four runaways in the past (who all had children), returned the juvi to her mother without incident - this fifth cop,(handling this current incident that lead to this current situation), is young and with no children. He listened to the juvi's lies, included the verifiable lies in his report, had a judge sign a search warrant, and executed this warrant that same evening at 0100 am. - the laundry room has an exterior door that ALWAYS has access, unlocked, to the outside, there is a window with a screen, there is running water, etc. - the laundry room has a door that leads into the lower apartment (the juvi and her mother's) - there is NO way a person can be locked IN the laundry room even though the juvi lied to police about this. She was locked OUT of the apartment until her mother got home because she had threatened damage to the unit in the past - the juvi was never FORCED to stay in the room. She had the OPTION of staying at school a little longer so when she got home her mother would be back from work, which was about 3:30 pm, or coming home, and having ACCESS to the laundry room to do her homework, with the desk and chair her mother got her for that purpose. - she was never forced to sleep in the laundry room - the boyfriend was implicated because the juvi lied about being locked in a room that CAN'T be locked, in his completely separate apartment. - I don't know exactly how the juvi got the bucket idea, but I've got to admit that was pretty creative. I think she knew there was a five gallon pail that had previously been used as a 'toilet' on a construction site when no toilet was available. Somehow she turned this into 'being forced to use it' - incredible, isn't it? - when she decided to come home and be in the laundry room, instead of staying at school a bit later, it was never for more than 60 minutes Some people have asked how the cops could arrest someone based on lies. I've been struggling with this question ever since this happened. I've been told by an attorney that the cops are not required to verify the statements of a 15 year old before the arrest takes place. Therefore, it seems, that any fifteen year-old can make up lies, and have someone's house searched for any reason. At least in Eau Claire, Wisconsin. It appears it's up to the officer to go ahead with a complaint and carry it out, based on his or her own judgment. I've also been asked what happens if the juvi comes forward with her lies. Will they drop the case? I don't know the answer to that. One would hope so. But the anger (obvious from her Facebook post) this child has at her mother for being taken away from her 'friends' at her other school, is unlikely to render her admission of these lies. I know we tend to see the pictures in the paper and on the news and we have a tendency to presume guilt even though the story headline contains the words, 'alleged' or 'charged with'. Most of you have been very open minded waiting to get the facts, and that is much appreciated! I used to think that as a law-abiding, model citizen, with a spotless criminal record, we could just follow the law and not be unreasonably searched. Apparently I was very naive. If I could give you details as to how the ECPD searched my house, and how they handled this case, you would not believe what happened. You would also be appalled to know this can happen to you even if you have committed no crime. The hardest part now is the patience waiting until all of this is resolved. I believe in the end, everyone involved will get their just deserts. Obviously I don't have time to check this site all the time with what has been going on and taking up a lot of my time, but I will make an effort to check back if someone has a serious question as to what is going on. Thanks for your understanding!

• I'm with mom on this one. Come on, people make too much of a big deal on creature comforts, but they voluntarily sleep on a mat and use a bucket when camping. She clearly was trying to regain control of her daughter by any means necessary. A mom who doesn't care would have just let her run. A trip to juvie would have just given her daughter connections with other delinquents and doesn't solve the fact that she needs to learn to respect her mother. On a side note, whats with the boyfriend's cheesy grin in his mug shot? lol He looks so happy to be getting his booking photo taken.

• I don't agree with the way this mom handled it, but I get where she is coming from.My now 18 yr old son decided when he was 16 he would "run away" for the summer.He didn't go far.He was staying at friends houses within our town and the neighboring town.The police were of no use.If he was not doing any thing wrong (illegal is more like it) they would not force him to come home. We live in a moderately upper class town and he was probably staying at houses better than ours.One time when we did manage to literally capture him and bring him home, we took all of his clothes out of his room, including his shoes, so if he did run again he would be stuck with what was on his body.He stayed for a few days and disappeared again.We even tried to have him hospitalized because he was not taking his medicine for possible bipolar (which we are not even sure if that is what he has)and we couldn't get any help because he was not threatening harm to himself or anyone else. So basically, if your kid in not robbing people or stores, threatening to kill you or himself, you're on your own.I can imagine her desperation.However, using a pail for a toilet is uncalled for. I know, long story, but I know what she is going through.My son came home at the end of the summer like nothing happened and has been home and semi-behaving since.It took a long time to trust him again and I still do not totally trust him.

• I think the real question you should be asking is "Why was the daughter so intent on running away?" Was she trying to escape an abusive household? It seems that would be the most likely considering the circumstances.

• @ John Smalls: I can't say that I agree with you about the juvie. Do you know what that place does to a child? That would actually make her daughter worse. I back the mom only 98%, and I say this because if she wanted to lock her daughter anywhere it should have been her bedroom. Let her out to use the bathroom and do her chores, and actually really the 800 word essay went way over...it's like double the punishment! I don't know what is going on with kids today, and the lack of respect....this is our future?

• @ Squid If the mother would have taken away all of the girl's clothes except for 2 shirts and 2 pants then she'd be taken to jail for child neglect. But anyways, just a genral comment: Honestly, there are lots of teens that just need this kind of treatment before they straighten out. All of the punishments my mom gave me would definately be considered 'mental harm' and 'abuse'. I hated my home and because of her strict rules and everything I had almost no social life since I wasn't allowed anywhere outside of school. But you know what? I'm a functioning adult *gasp*. Someone who had a parent that put their foot down in an extremely harsh way grew up to be a good person? how shocking! I've never been arrested (don't even have a record), I don't have any kids, I've only been pregnant once (with my boyfriend that I had been living with constantly for 1 year, then miscarried. I still live with him.), I have a good job (assembling medical supplies, surgical items, and first aid items), I was going to college before the economy went to crap and now I'm returning to finish my degree in psychology. The point is, the mom in this story was doing her daughter a service and being a parent. If the daughter had successfully ran away then the daughter would be ALOT worse off then being in a closet. I think that in some cases the law is more harmful then helpful. And this is one of those cases.

• I want to punch him right in his shit-eating grin!

• Sorry, Gyminimist74. Just trying to bust out some manly Wisconsin talk, and that's the first thing I thought of on the fly. Since everyone makes fun of the Midwest, I feel it's okay to shoot back.

• I say if you train up a child in the right path he or she will follow it. I believe this was to survere of a punishment. Today and any day you have to sit your children down and find out what is on their minds and hearts. They have every right to exspress themselfs also [in] a respectable manner. Also we dont know what was going on in the home first of all. For the boyfriend toosee this kind of degrading punishment aND NOT REPORT IT IT. SOMETHINGS NOT RIGHT FROM THE BEGINNING!!!! There are always two sides to every story. God Bless these children!!!

• Wow Pete that was harsh...Im from Cali....what is so bad about Cali?

• THIS IS NOT THE FULL STORY. I AM SOMEONE CLOSE TO ONE SIDE OF THIS FAMILY. DON'T BE TOO QUICK TO SIDE WITH THIS MOTHER. ACCORDING TO THE DAUGHTER, SHE HAS BEEN DOING THIS SINCE SHE WAS 4 YEARS OLD!

• What is going on in that home that would make a kid prefer running away to sleeping under a safe roof? Things aren't always as they appear. M. Scott Peck's "People of the Lie" illustrates this well.

• @Squid, even just the threat of #4 is a very effective tool in disciplining a child. This summer my 13 year old started slacking off, so after not being able to get her to do her chores week after week after week I finally gave her the ultimatum to have them all done before I got home from work or I would toss out everything she had, minus her clothes and bed. Just the threat of losing her every prized possession was enough to convince her to drop the attitude and catch up on her every chore. Afterward, she asked me if I would have carried through on my threat. I assured her that I most certainly would have. She cried and begged me if ever it came to that to consider giving her possessions to a charity rather than just toss them in the garbage. Ultimately, it not only gave her the motivation she was lacking, but gave her a much needed lesson. You know, when I was a child I ran away all the time. I remember at age 6 I packed a bag and grabbed my teddy bear and walked into the living room to tell my parents "Goodbye forever". My mom freaked, but my dad gave a quiet grin. Neither stopped me but wished me "Good luck with that!" I headed off to the woods, Huck Finn style, determined never to return. Well, long story short, it wasn't long after nightfall that I decided I had it pretty good at home after all and returned home rather than face a miserable night in the cold and rain. Over the next ten years following I ran away several more times, each time as determined as the last, and each time returning in humility as before. Perhaps we do treat females and male children differently in our society. I would never think of letting my daughter run away and find out herself the hard way how good she has it at home...but with a son I probably would have done as my parents did without hesitation. I guess we expect boys to find trouble and recognize that they need to learn for themselves how to deal with trouble, whereas girls we want to shelter and protect them from trouble (and even sometimes themselves) and lock them in the tower. We tend to treat boys like Tom Sawyer and girls like Rapunzel. So much for gender equality.

• 1. There are children who HAVE to live like this, go to India & you'll see what I mean. So I don't feel sorry for this girl. 2. The mother being arrested is B.S. my parents raged on me, threw me around like a rag doll, told me they hated me & wanted me to die, etc all because they hated themselves & their asses never got sent to jail for "mental harm" or physical abuse. 3. The juvie cell that she would have had if her mother would have called the police wouldn't have been that much more comfortable than the laundry closet which I'm sure was a somewhat decent size. 4. Instead of locking her daughter in a closet she should of just stripped her of EVERYTHING, no law against taking away all of her clothes & leaving her with 2 ugly shirts & 2 ugly pair of pants for the week, taking away all entertainment (MP3 player, computer, television, telephone, etc)...

• If the daughter was well fed, not abused, clean and healthy and at least got some time out of the room in fresh air - I say it's none of anyones business how she is raised. That's not the road I would have taken, but desperate people take desperate measures. When my teenage son went through his rebellous stage, it was a nightmare, but we got through it and he and I are very close now. Teenagers at this age are trying to proclaim their independence and you as a parent are trying to protect them and since we all went through it, we know what mistakes they will make. Mom was just trying to protect her baby from the horrible people out there who would do her harm. There is just no easy way through the teenage years.

• I would have locked her ass up too... The problem is that you cant get any help from cops, social workers etc... Unless something terrible happened to this girl on the streets. THEN... It's oh shes a BAD MOM, she should have locked her in the house instead of letting her run the streets like that.. But when shes had enough and locks her ass in the house, shes still a BAD MOM.. DAMNED if ya do and DAMNED if ya dont... If there is an update with more info I would love to read it...

• Even inmates have toilets. Come on.

• I don't know, "and forced her to use a bucket as a bathroom" that really bothers me. If it were some other child I think people would say that were terrible. I just don't really think anyone deserves to be treated like that.

• The full story, according to Caryn's daughter, is that Caryn had been using this "punishment" since the daughter was 4 years old. Does that change onyone's mind?

• I wish everyone in this world would mind their own business. There is nothing morally or neglectfully wrong about this punishment. Just think, if the mother didn't care to intervene, then where would the girl be? Somewhere on the street with no way to survive. As a parent, I wouldn't be able to sleep at night not knowing where my child was. At least in this situation, she took it upon herself to show her daughter a little taste of what the REAL world is: cruel and unfair. She didn't harm her at all.

• I wish everyone in this world would mind their own business. There is nothing morally or neglectfully wrong about this punishment. Just think, if the mother didn't care to intervene, then where would the girl be? Somewhere on the street with no way to survive. As a parent, I wouldn't be able to sleep at night not knowing where my child was. At least in this situation, she took it upon herself to show her daughter a little taste of what the REAL world is: cruel and unfair. She didn't harm her at all.

• Nope, I agree with the mother..and by the looks of the mother,who obviously looks from Asian descent, whose to say that wasn't a lighter punishment than their culture offers as a punishment for running away? But I also just read Bens post and he has a strong point too.

• Most parents in this situation send their kids to boarding school, which can offer substantial security and are generally more pleasant to be in than that laundry room. Really, though, if the kid already ran away four times, the mom was obviously already ridiculous and probably abusive.

• Sounds to me like this Mother was doing what ever she could to keep her daughter safe & off the streets. I think it's the daughter that is causing her Mother the 'Mental Harm'. As a Mother, I would do what I had to do to protect my children from their own stupidity.

• I agree with Mark. My first thought was "it depends on how long the girl was in there." One day: it might be very similiar to being grounded to your room for a day. One month: Different. So, I dunno, but I have to say that any man who smiles for his mugshot should automatically get a free pass.

• I think the mom should have at least let her use the actual bathroom, but besides that I think I side with the mom. When I was in my younger teens I tried running away (keyword is tried). My aunt found me and took me home. I was on lock down, which soon became a regular thing with the years following that incident. I thribed on being alone, so my mom made sure that I was her shadow, I was forced to go wherever she went, I didn't even get to use the bathroom by myself. Everything was on 'her time'. So unless she was heading towards the bathroom I had to hold it in. If she was going to sleep then I could go to sleep. And God help me if I wasn't at school or at home. Even though it was Hell for me and it ended up with her kicking me out at 18, me and her actually have a pretty good relationship. And I realize that I was a bad kid and probably deserved worse then I ever got from her. But the point is, after that I never tried running away again. I was put on 'lock down' for other reasons, but running away was never the reason after that one time. Also, I find it funny how the boyfriend is smiling in his picture.

• yes they are all gentlemen, the horses that is lol-

• cw, sounds like an excellent vacay. Horseys are sweet creatures. Much smarter than a lotta guys I know!

• maybe the mom was letting the daughter know what life in jail would be like...or something similar

• just relaxing-hanging with my horses. My hubby and I are going to a rodeo on Friday...can't wait!! :D

• It's hard to tell without more background info, maybe the kid is really living a hellish life and would be better off being homeless somewhere else, or maybe the kid is an idiot who should run away and get raped/murdered while hitchhiking. The bit about the mom making her shit in a bucket suggests the mom is psychotic.

• I just wanted to add that my husband is a counsellor working with troubled children and from his experience calling the cops doesn't work! All they will do is just find the kid and bring them back home. They don't lock the kids up or nothing unless the child has committed a crime so the parents are really at an disadvantage unless the kid does something against the law. He has gotten calls from numerous parents saying their kids have runoff and they don't know what to do becoz the cops can't help them. Maybe if the law was changed so runaways could be put in jail for a few days they wouldn't do it.

• cw, that's how I would've felt too. Yipes. I noticed at the other post that you said you'll be on vacay next week. Good for you! Going anywhere special or just relaxing?

• you make a good point alexa-I remember when I was being a not so nice teenager one of my concerns was having my Dad and Mom having to go to court due to my bullshit. I didn't care really what happened to me but I didn't want them involved in any of it.

• I have a novel suggestion: why not put the immediate family in jail, along with their offending child? I'm serious. Because I think more kids would stop short if they knew their beloved mother or father or sister would get put behind bars too.

• While the method was wrong, I can understand where the mom might be coming from. My mom was a foster parent for several years and I can tell you that some of the kids are out of control. That said, she should have called social services or the police when the girl ran away, not locked her in a room. The essay part did make me laugh a bit though, that part definitely isn't abuse though I bet the girl thought it was. :)

• @ mother of one.. No disrespect, but if you did change your alarm code every night to go off, I guarantee your child would be out the front door or out the window, before you could even come out of your bedroom.. Teenagers are swift, sneaky, and will stop at nothing to get what they want, if they are this bad.. I have a niece only related by marriage thankfully, she gave new meaning to the words incorrigible teen.. She ran away, stole from family members, did drugs, and was just down right nasty, she is now 18 and the family couldn't be happier that she is pretty much out of our lives.. but as teenager, the law did nothing, until she was finally got with drugs one night she ran away to go to a party.. I say bring back stiffer penalties for juveniles to make them think twice about starting on a path of destruction.. There is serious flaws with the juvenile system

• Being the mother of two teenagers and one almost teen. I have to say the mom was right. My 16 year old (boy) has a major problem with the mouth and thinks he can do anything he wants. My 12 year old (boy) always tries to take off when ever he gets yelled at. No spanking involved.Go forbid you spank him, then it;s "I'll call the police and have you arrested." The problem is now the kids have more support than the parents do. If you call the police, you pay the fine, if your kids out past curfew, you pay the fine.If you spank your kids, no matter what they have done, you get in trouble. If you allow your kid to get incarcerated, you not only pay the fine. But you miss your kid and know he/she will have a record forever. I have a nineteen year old also. She was never as disrespectful as her brothers, and a nine year old who is learning from her older brothers attitudes, and not always in a good way. I believe the way the laws have changed have basically put handcuffs on parents.

• I'm with the mom on this one if the daughter has a history of running away and no one has stepped in to help mom with this unruly child she has to do something to make sure her kid isn't ripping and running the streets. I guess the cops want to have another young girl raped and murdered on the streets. I guess urinating in a bucket is a bit much she could've at least let her use the bathroom and just monitor her actions. Hopefully I as a parent never have to be faced with a decision like this. I hope they get the mom and daughter some help so this situation can be resolved in a non acrimonious way becoz its obvious the mom was just doing what she thought necessary to keep her daughter from being the next hot topic on Nancy Grace

• The punishment does seem harsh. But maybe her mother thought she would rather do that,than get a visit from the cops one day- telling her that her run away daughter is dead.

• Yeah Pete, I'm torn on this one as well. I guess it comes down to how long did she keep her daughter confined in the Laundry Room? A day? A weekend? A week? A month? If she had been kept there for just a few days then I think the parents deserve a pass and a pat on the back. If she had been kept there for a month, then yeah...that's getting into some abusive territory. My 13 year old daughter's best-friend has run away 5 times, one time sparking an Amber Alert across the State (and she has tried to convince my daughter to run away with her...thankfully my daughter tells me and the authorities when she does). Other than Lo-Jacking your kid what can you do to keep them from running away? (And wouldn't Lo-Jacking be considered "abusive" too as you are infringing upon their inalienable right to privacy?) Keeping them on a leash is considered abusive too. You can't tie them to their bed as that will get you a one-way ticket to prison. What is left for a parent to do? With 1 out of 4 children under 18 are already living on the streets in America, we don't need any more runaways (yes, *AT LEAST* 25% of children in America are homeless!). And we then turn around and send parents to prison for doing what they can to keep their kids off the street and out of trouble? I really want to know more details before I pass judgment one way or the other, but right now I'm kind of leaning in favor of the parents here.

• It is tough being a mother of a teen. It nearly ruined my relationship with my son. At one point, I thought it would come to blows between the two of us. Once I realized this, I began working on de-escalating the situation. Now that he is 22 we are doing great! I agree, Pete. A parent has to do what a parent has to do. What were her choices anyway? Sending her to a girls home? I sure hope they are easy on her and that her teen understands that the mom was truly trying to keep her from harm.

• The mother was wrong. If the daughter kept running away she should have caled the police who should have put her in juvie and there she would stay locked up legally and after she gets released if she keeps running away put her back in juvie until she's 18 and then we all know at 18 noone cares about these kids anymore then she can run away to any city she wants and start selling herself on the streets like any repectable runaway.

• I'd have to see the laundry room before I pass judgement-

• Hrmm... Mom could use a 'stern talking-to' about bathroom hygiene, and fire hazards, but other than that I support her 99%.

• I don't know what I think about this story. I wish my son would run away four times. I would be mad to. Now would I go to the extent of locking him in the laudry room...probably not, but he definitely wouldn't be leaving the house. If I had to lock all the windows, sleep in front of the doors, or better yet change the ADT code every night before going to sleep so it would go off, so be it!! Considering the cirumstances, I believe she should be punished, but won't that allow her daughter to run a mock?

• I don't get the "mental harm"....but I can see the complaint if being confined to a windowless room being a fire hazard. Its not like it was a closet with no light, no room to move.

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