James Brienzo, Moron of the Day: Walmart Thief Hides in Dumpster, Get Compacted in Garbage Truck


Early Wednesday morning, James Brienzo decided to do a little thieving at Walmart. Police were called to the store in Alliance, Ohio at 6 a.m. for a theft in progress. When they pulled up to a rear fire exit, they found a car running but no one inside…

Then Brienzo emerged from the store with a shopping cart full of stuff. Upon seeing police he took off running. His wheels proved superior to the cops chasing him. He was able to lose his pursuers.

James Brienzo was compacted multiple times after hiding in a dumpster and being picked up by a garabge truck

Figuring it unwise to walk home while police were still looking for him, our hero decided to hide in a dumpster. This proved very unfortunate, since that particular dumpster was scheduled for pickup that morning, and Brienzo ended up in the back of a garbage truck.

An hour after his Walmart caper, one of Brienzo’s friends called 911. Brienzo had used his cell phone to call the person from the back of the truck, saying he needed to be rescued. It seems to the compactor was repeatedly crushing the living shit out of our hero.

Using Brienzo’s cell, police tracked the truck to a recycling center, where its refuse was dumped to reveal our moronic thief. But he was repeatedly compacted during his journey, so he had to life-flighted to a hospital in Cleveland. He’s expected to survive.

See our last bad guy to take a beating from a garbage truck: Carlos Medina-Bailon, Moron of the Day: Escaped Prisoner Crushed By Trash Compactor.