Top 5 Douchebags: Kayla Henriques Stabs Brother's Girlfriend After Facebook Feud Over $20
Monday, March 7, 2011 at 7:00 am
We all know that 18-year old men tend to exhibit an age-based congenital difficulty known as idiocy. It's one reason why there are laws against underage drinking. Unfortunately, they're easy to subvert, and in May 2006 the now 23-year old Eduardo Adolfo Gonzalez shot fellow 18-year old Jerry Adair at a bar near University of Central Florida campus when one of Adair's friends was bumped and spilled beer on one of Gonzalez friends. (Yes, yes, we know, every drop is sacred.)
An argument broke out, and Gonzalez and his friends were kicked out of the bar. Gonzalez and his short-bus buddies waited for them in the parking lot. Mistaking himself for a man because of the cold steel in his hand, Gonzalez confronted Adair, shot a Good Samaritan that tried to intervene, and then fired 8-10 shots into Adair, continuing to fire as he lay on the ground.
After he was arrested and jailed, Gonzalez convinced a 16-year old girl, Melissa Hensley to help him hire a hitman to kill five witnesses. (Quite the bloodthirst on this little hood.) A doctor testified that Hensley was mentally disabled (birds of a feather), and proved inept enough to hire an undercover cop. (What mother signs a consent form allowing her daughter to visit a murder suspect in jail?) In 2008, Hensley was sentenced to two years in jail.
Gonzalez who initially tried (unsuccessfully) to skate on mental illness, plead guilty just before the conclusion of the trial to avoid the death penalty. He was sentenced to consecutive life sentences for murder with a firearm and attempted murder count, with separate sentences for his conspiracy, solicitation to commit murder and witness tampering charges. He will likely never see the unbarred light of day.
It will give him plenty of time to get a handle on the idea of manhood, or maybe just the hard, painful penetrating reality of someone else's. Just a hint: Imagine yourself of a sandy tropical shore with a nicely appointed beach house, because you're going to be spending a lot of time there.
Yep, Floridians love their beer. It's not getting drunk, it's the Florida state of mind, aka "water on the brain." So it is that 43-year old Jason Higdon and his 21-year old son, Junior, attacked 46-year old Jeffery Wilkerson last month for taking the last beer. The dynamic duo put a 10" slash in Wilkerson's abdomen. The two Astor, Florida men fled the scene while witnesses helped Wilkerson, who was airlifted to a Daytona hospital and survived the attack.
Absent beer, though, truly ingenious idiots will find a way to get fucked up, demonstrating a McGyver-esque ability to obliterate their senses with common household items. Cynthia Palmer knew her next fix was as close as Bed, Bath & Beyond. The 29-year old Calvert City, Kentucky woman snorted bath salts and got into a vehicle with her 5-year old and 2-year old on her way to Fort Campbell, Tennessee. ("Heigh-ho, Heigh-ho, we've turned Blue Silk into blow!")
Along the way she started to hallucinate, so she pulled her vehicle onto the shoulder of I-24, and started to hoof it. She dropped her 2-year old on the side of the road, but just kept going. Police found the boy lying on the side of the road with a big gash in his head. They found Palmer further down the road, walking in the median, carrying her 5-year old. Among the many charges she faces are first degree assault, wanton endangerment, operating a motor vehicle under the influences of drugs and public intoxication.
The salts have already been banned in several states, though one wonders how useful that is, seeing as how idiots always seem to find a way to manifest their affliction. Should we all have to suffer bland, odorless baths because of the behavior of a few bad apples courting disaster one way or another -- whether by putting their face too close to the electric fan, using a blender for self-pleasure, treating their anus as a light socket or some other inventive inanity.
Talk about no money down! Used car salesman Robert Bearden offered Sandra and James Davis of Macon, Georgia a deal on their 1998 Dodge Caravan, picking up their $281/month payment in exchange for sex with their 14-year old daughter. You'd think they'd gotten a nice Audi. Especially from a 67-year old man who's dealership's called Shorty's.
The parents are also restricted from having any contact with the child for 20 years. The girl, now 16, spoke to the court, letting the judge know she was now in a good home environment under Department of Family and Child Services' supervision, and that she's doing well in school and academically. It's nice to know that however shitty one's parents and prior home life, a child can rise above it with the right support.
The amazing thing about the stabbing death of 22-year old Kamisha Richards was that according to several sources, she'd been like a big sister to Henriques, an 18-year old student at John Adams High School. Richards had taken Henriques under her wing when her mother died 15 years ago. She threw a baby shower for Henriques last year and was helping plan her son Alex's first birthday in May.
But lately the two had been feuding on Facebook like the Hatfield and McCoys or Michael and Lindsay Lohan. Richards had posted Sunday, that his will be "the last time u will con me into giving u money," after Henriques used the $20 Richards had lent her for diapers and formula on something else. Henriques replied 10 minutes later, "Dnt try to expose me mama but I'm not tha type to thug it ova facebook see u wen u get frm wrk." (She was willing to thug out in reality, though, obviously.)
Richards recently graduated (irony alert!) from John Jay College of Criminal Justice and worked security for JPMorgan Chase, as well as at a nursing home. She was awaiting results from her LSATs and planning to start law school in the Fall.
The stabbing occurred at 10:30 p.m. last Monday, at the Brooklyn home shared by Henriques, her mother, her brother/Richards' 25-year old boyfriend Ramel, and relatives of both women. Richards lived in another apartment in Cypress Hill Houses.
The fight escalated to a heated in-person argument. Richards allegedly opened Henriques fridge and poured out some of the baby formula, saying, it was about half of what Henriques owed her. Henriques allegedly used a large kitchen steak knife to plunged it into Richards' chest. She was rushed to Brookdale University Hospital where she died shortly thereafter. Henriques claims the assault was self-defense, though police expressed skepticism.
Asked by a reporter as she was guided into a squad car if she felt any remorse, Henriques replied, "No, 'cause it was a mistake... I was protecting my kids." Yeah, they'll be real protected while you're serving 10-20 years for second degree murder and criminal possession of a weapon. Eighteen year olds, mmm. They're crazy. And a crazy bitch is a poor candidate for tough love. For reals.
Read last Monday's Douchebags of the Week: Joshua Jones Arrested For Sexually Abusing Girlfriend's 8-Year Old.