Police aren’t releasing any names, only saying that the Rotten Little Bastard is a freshman at Goddard High School in Roswell, New Mexico. But by some miracle of ecclesiastical charity, he managed to get a girlfriend. Now his big problem was getting her in bed…
The 14-year-old kept pestering his sweetheart to send him a nude photo of herself. When her resistance wore down, she finally gave in.
Of course, the kid wasn’t content to witness her pixelated nudity. He was hoping for something a little more along the lines of the close-contact grinding variety. So being the really shitty boyfriend that he is, he threatened to post her naked photo on his Facebook page if she wouldn’t have sex with him.
The 15-year-girl refused, so up went the photo. At some point it was taken down, but the little prick put it up again.
But instead of blackmailing her into the throes of awkward groping and premature ejaculation, Captain Dickhead’s ploy had the opposite effect of summoning Roswell’s Finest. They charged the little asshole with harassment and intimidation, then threw his scrawny bones into the juvenile clink.
See our last tale from the Douchebags file: Caleb Patrick Land Beats His Girlfriend’s Dogs to Death, Claims It Was an Accident.