A Florida man found himself in hot water this week after a woman called police to report she’d seen him masturbating in a CVS parking lot. When police caught up with the man inside the store, he admitted he’d had his hands in his pants, but claimed he was only scratching a serious rash on his genitals. The cops were dubious, so the man offered to show them his rash-stricken junk. Amazingly, the police took him up on the offer — and let him go after checking out his balls. Miami New Times has the story.