Why 4/20 is the Worst Day 1
Dies While Parents Getting High? 2
Joins Cancer Faker's Hall of Fame 3

Welcome to another all-new episode of Douchebags of the Week, fresh baked with wholesome D-list celebrities. This week's top prize goes to badgered husband Muzzammil Hassan, who calmed his wife with a hunter's knife. But first, please welcome a familiar face...

Thursday, January 28, 2010 at 11:21 am
From the Great Moments in Dope & Incest File comes this nasty little story out of Omaha, Nebraska: A 15-year-old boy says his mother had sex with him nightly over a two year period while he was in the seventh and eighth grades...

Tags: Nebraska
Tuesday, January 26, 2010 at 6:09 am
Tuesday's Breakfast Reading from around the Village Voice Empire: An 18-year-old girl begs for her life before she's stabbed to death. A jailer caught beating a girl claims he was scared of her. And a new breakthrough in meth head stupidity...

Monday, January 25, 2010 at 12:51 pm
UPDATE: If you can believe it, the case of missing Florida 5-year-old Haleigh Cummings has just gotten weirder. Donna Brock was paid by a search firm to get close to Misty Croslin, in hopes of coaxing a confession. But it appears the paid informant went rogue. See update after the jump...

Tuesday, January 19, 2010 at 2:45 pm
Monika Spraggins believes in the American spirit of independence and self-reliance. So when she caught a fellow resident of a Memphis boarding house selling weed to her 12-year-old son, she decided this wasn't a matter for police; it was a matter for mom...

Tags: Tennessee
Tuesday, January 19, 2010 at 5:02 am

A pretty funny video of U.S. soldiers forced to burn all the wild marijuana growing on their base in Afghanistan. As one resigned serviceman puts it, "I think I'm going to have to kill myself tonight." For guys who don't get paid much, this has gotta be painful...

Friday, January 15, 2010 at 5:46 am
Today's Breakfast Reading: A grandma fakes pregnancy, fortunately locates naive good Samaritan. A stoner who could use a lesson in bong storage management. And a daughter who couldn't bear parting with her dad -- or at least his pension checks...

Monday, January 11, 2010 at 12:53 pm
Special ed teacher Daniel Kelley and his girlfriend, Gina Siclari, were jogging on Staten Island when they had the misfortune of running into model Gypsy Porfirio. You might say she has a little problem with pharmaceuticals -- especially while driving...

Tags: New York
Thursday, January 7, 2010 at 12:36 pm
It was a minor league bust, with some minor league dope dealers to match. On Monday, police in Marathon, Florida were tipped off to six pot plants growing in a area. So after nabbing the weed, they left a fake note offering to return the weed for a $200 ransom...

Tags: Florida
Thursday, January 7, 2010 at 11:57 am

​On the morning of February 4, Dr. Trent
Pierce, chairman of the Arkansas State Medical Board, left his West Memphis home for work. Someone had left a tire behind his Lexus. When he bent to move it, a bomb went off...

Tags: Arkansas